Feeling very alone

Hello I’m Louise lost the man of my dreams and rock 12 months ago and am really struggling.
Would be so grateful to chat to others going through the same.

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Hi Cambridge

I’m in the same situation as you as in two weeks time, it will be a year since I lost my husband and I’m really struggling as well.

I think for most of this last year I’ve been in a state of shock/numbness and have just got through one day at a time. Sadly, the numbness is wearing off and the awful reality is hitting home.

I still can’t really accept what has happened and just keep hoping I will wake up from this nightmare.

I’m happy to chat here or through private messaging.

Take care of yourself,

X Julie

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Sorry, I just realised your name is Louise! X

Hello, I’m new on this site (well any social media platform tbh) but I want to say that I truly am empathetic to your heartache you are experiencing. I am happy to chat over this community or PM if you feel more comfortable. I apologise for the time…this is my normal now I tend to some of grief by absorbing information…just a distraction tactic I realise but wtm?
Its 14 months since my husband died suddenly and unexpectedly. Not much of a family connection beforehand on his side, so in a flash I was a 39 year old widow and single mum and only carer for 3 children…my husband was stepfather to my eldest who is 13 and father to our now 5 and 4 year olds…just not here anymore and I feel it’s getting harder to cope with. I’ve read alot on grief and spousal loss and I know I’m still in denial. I cant face it and I’ve distracted myself by caring for the kids. I cant look at any photos nor deal with his belongings but try to support the kids with their own grief when really I haven’t a clue one day to next. I dont have a social circle nor any friends and I wont burden the two people closest to me my parents as they are getting older and I need them for the kids more so. I relate to you, I never really thought about this far into my grief at the start and part of me feels a sadness that it has been 14 months and I maybe have just scraped through every day absolutely exhausted just getting kids to school and the whole caboodle. I wouldn’t have considered though feeling worse but I do. I think of him more often and I dream alot where he is there in some way, and yes I totally expect him walking through the door. I reckon I’m heading for a complete break it’s just a matter of time…so you are not alone in your emotions Louise and I’m here if you need to lighten your head of any issues you want to offload. I’m Tracy btw. Warm hugs :smile:

Hello Louise,sorry for your loss,would like to chat as you’re a lot further down the line than me.I lost my wife of 28 years 8 days ago,she was only 57, and I’m only 52. I only have my brother for support,he’s been brilliant but when he goes I just go to bed and cry.

Hi just to say hello as you’re going through very early grief like I am. I lost my husband 10 days ago and like you I’m finding it so hard to cope, I just cry and feel like I’ve lost the rest of my life now and all the plans we had. Let’s hope we eventually find we get through the days and nights easier but I think it must take a long time and it’s so hard to deal with ?

Hello,sorry for your loss.Yes it looks like we are both going through and having the same emotions as it’s so very early days for us.please keep in touch,I’m finding this site is really helping…….I truly believe it’s good to talk,in times like this……….Are you eating?….
I’ve got no appetite and I’ve lost a stone and a half

Hi thank you yes I think on here we can at least understand each others pain and know what its like to feel like falling apart every day. No one really knows what’s it’s like till it happens - I thought I’d be stronger than this, I lived on my own for 7 years when I was younger but after we got married you just get into that routine of someone always being there for you and the daily routines you had. All that’s gone now and I just feel like I’m not really here anymore. As for the eating, I’m doing the opposite of you and probably overeating because I’m bored and not cooking proper meals anymore because what’s the point when it’s just for one ? Sorry to be miserable and I hope we can get through this and feel better someday. Take care


Hello Cambridge
I am so sorry for your loss
I am further down the line to you all 4 years since I loss my loving husband
I found the first year I was so busy sorting all the necessary legal work mortgage letting everyone know that he had died - and that was never straight forward
You are just surviving when you have to explain that’s if you can get through to a human person on the phone !!
That the person you have shared your life has gone

reading all your posts you are all grieving now
It doesn’t get easier but you do learn to live with the heartache
I still get good and bad days - of course I will the love of my life has gone my soul mate
I find the sadness thing for me is not being able to share all the day to day events in my life with him
I am just happy he is not going through this pain
Talking sharing your emotions does help you get through the days
And this site is the best place to come as we all understand and are not judgemental

Sending my love to you all


i will join the early stages club.

im only at day 7 , today my sister in law went home after being here the last 2 weeks.

its a scary feeling, im 54 and have been in a relationship twice married for 34 tears , now in alone without the love of my life . words cannot describe how frightened i am but i feel guilty as im thinking of me, when my poor wife lost a grim fight with cancer

i cant give you any words that will make you feel better, just get through the day

There IS a light at the end of this seemingly never ending dark tunnel -
it’s just there are what feels like so many hurdles & obstacles to navigate.
Daily life does become more manageable. Still sh** - slightly less painful. :disappointed_relieved:
If you think of your special person , you are not alone.

G. Xx

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Hi Julie, I am in a similar situation to you. On 29 June my beloved husband Peter will have been gone 12 months. I am dreading the day as I feel so alone. My son and his lovely wife have been amazing to me but the loneliness still prevails. They are actually going to take me out on the anniversary. They miss Peter too I do not forget that but I feel as if I am still in the same place as when he first died. I cry so much even now and miss him so much, will it ever improved. I don’t think it will for me, I knew him for 59 years and we were married nearly 55 of them. I miss him so much. Sorry for the moan but what else can I do but vent my sad feelings love to all Moira xx

Hi Moira

Ian’s first anniversary was on the 18th of this month and I still find it so hard to believe that I’ve been without him for a year. I keep asking myself how is it possible as to me it seems like yesterday!
I found the build up worse than the day itself as I was lucky enough to spend the weekend with family who had known him for many, many years including numerous Christmases.
Yesterday was his 70th birthday so we celebrated it with a cake and candles which his four year old granddaughter blew out.
It’s good that your son and daughter in law will be with you tomorrow to share in many fond memories of Peter and I hope you find some comfort in this.
59 years is such a long time to know a person that it is no wonder you still miss Peter and always will. I was with Ian for over 40 years and like you with Peter, will miss him for the rest of my life……

Take care,

Julie x