My husband died suddenly 18 months ago. Every now and again I feel let down by family when things dont happen the way I expect. It then spirals and I feel worthless like no one cares and I push them away unintentionally. This isn’t me and I know it hurts them and it hurts me even more but I have no control when this takes over me. I dont function sometimes cant keep still. Has anyone else felt like this?
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Hi @Diane57,
Thank you so much for sharing this with the community. I’m so sorry you’re feeling this way. I’m sure someone will be along to offer their support, but I just wanted to let you know that you have been heard and you are not alone.
Take good care,
Seaneen
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Sorry for your loss. I feel a bit strange around my family sometimes. I’m seven months into losing my partner suddenly. I feel they expect me to have begun to move forward by now. My sister always includes me in family celebrations but I am not in a celebratory mood. I am devastated and just can’t find it in myself to join in or talk to people. Obviously they have to live their lives but I am so envious of others who still have their partners, it just contributes to my loneliness. I just don’t feel understood or that I belong anymore. I don’t feel that I can share this outside of the online community as I don’t want to offend anyone.
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Yes I feel the same I don’t like being in couple situations just not sure where I fit anymore. I do go swimming 3 times a week just to have routine and have joined a group called ladies travel buddies on Facebook and been out for a few lunches with them. My family have just dropped by the wayside it’s like it never happened. My daughter is wonderful and unfortunately she takes the brunt when my mood swings which totally is not fair she doesn’t deserve it .
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I feel like that today. My sister is staying with me a couple of weeks, she’s been sweet, patient and kind and I am so irritable and touchy, crying and screaming and reacting terribly, not at all like the person I was before my husband died. I think it’s because the person I was died when he died 2 months ago, and I don’t even know who I am anymore?
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Hi Diane
I know how you feel, 3 siblings have cut me off completely, at the worst time of my life and I don’t know why. They never text, never ask how I am, nothing. It’s over 6 months since I lost my lovely husband to pancreatic cancer after a few short weeks. We were together 33 years, married for 25, no kids.
I’m just sick of them and don’t have the energy for their stupid mind games. I find it hard enough getting out of bed every day to face work, and paint on the ‘face’ as everyone just expects you to be ‘over it’, as if there is such a thing. No getting over the loss of my soulmate and best friend.
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My brother is a jerk, He always was (as a kid) and remains so (in his 70’s now). I’ve tried to analyze why, but don’t really understand it. When my spouse first got ill (yrs back), he was a complete jerk, and when he passed we weren’t talking anymore (thankfully), but I doubt I would have even gotten an I’m sorry.
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Sorry for your loss, I feel the same even though I m seven months into grief now following my partner’s sudden death. We were together for almost 40 years. The best half of me died when he did. I’ve just had another meltdown, my usual ranting at God about why he was taken suddenly when he had so much to live for.
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Hi Peg2,
I’ve just read your post and all what you have said is so similar to my story.
I lost my husband on the 15th March 2025. We were together for 44 years married for 35 years. He was my best friend, soul mate, my everything. He was diagnosed with stage 4 bowel cancer in 2021 aged 58.
I have 3 sisters which I have had to distance myself from as I feel mentally exhausted with all their mind games. They have also been so insensitive since I lost my husband and therefore I’ve come to the conclusion I’d rather be on my own and lonely then be in their company.
Since I’ve stopped contact I feel I’m getting stronger and so relieved they can no longer control me.
I know moving forward I will never find true happiness but I would like to think that my husband is guiding me and sending me healing to try and live again rather than just existing.
Take care and stay strong xx
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Hi Diane57
Im so sorry for your loss.
I understand completely how your feeling totally. My family disowned me after I lost my beautiful daughter Elizabeth aged 31yrs in April 2025 to SUDEP. I attempted CPR whilst waiting for paramedics but they tried with machine but she’d gone 
.
My so called friends are the same they don’t come near anymore cos I talk about Elizabeth and end up sobbing 
.
Please know that what is happening is i think what happens to alot of us.
Look after yourself. Im here if you need to.
Sending virtual hugs 
Sharon. X
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Hi Diane 57
I am 5yrs in i I still feel strange around my brothers its like they don’t understand me at all they think I should be ok and over paul now how do I get over the love of my life the man that cherished and adored me like I did him we where married for 44yrs how am I supposed to get over that it so much easier to stay at home and when I see them not mention paul and that is hard why should I forget him I do not want to he was the biggest thing in my live
Swwetlady
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