Finding it hard to get motivated

Hi i lost my mum two years ago to dementia and i seem to be finding it harder to get over the loss. i have little motivation to do certain things and i am very emotional all the time. i dont think i have properly grieved, i have just been getting on with life and looking after my two girls.
i want to know what some of you have done to help you move on from losing a parent.

Hi Andy1
I’m sorry to hear of your loss especially of that horrible disease. I have that to come with my dad so I’m dreading it.
What makes you think you haven’t properly grieved? I can’t quite relate to what you are going through as I only lost my mum suddenly and unexpectedly almost 11 weeks ago. I’ve no idea how I’m going to feel in two years time. I suspect I shall still be deeply missing my mum, can’t imagine a time when I won’t. Clearly you were deeply loving towards your mum and like me would have done anything to make her happy.
I’ve been through a ridiculous number of confusing emotions over the weeks and now I mainly have this deep down sorrow that periodically bubbles up into an emotional outburst. This might happen when I’ve been engrossed in work and then suddenly remember that life isn’t as it was.
How did your grieving go over the weeks and months following her death?
I’ve have my wife and daughter to keep me from going mad so I count myself as very lucky. I don’t find it easy though but I don’t like to resist any emotions I feel and if I need tears then so be it. I’ve found talking to people a great help, both close friends and the people on here who I can relate to. I don’t know the magic formula to this process but with time I’m hoping I’ll find a way through. The way I see it right now is that I don’t want to move on from but rather live with my loss. There will always be some pain and I wouldn’t want it any other way.

Hi Andy1., I completely understand what you mean. I was doing ok for about a year and then slowly but surely it sinks in that you’ve actually lost someone who was part of ur whole life. I’m so, sorry for ur loss. I have downloaded a wee motivational app called, make me a better person. It gives u tips on how to get ur life back on track. I keep thinking, that’s what my mum would have wanted me to do. Although, truthfully, she probably would have thought it silly to use a phone to help u get up and go!

So sorry to hear you are still struggling. I’m too beginning to understand what a long sad journey grief is. I lost my mum 5 months ago and it hit me very hard. It totally broke me. But I struggled on went back to work and seemed to be doing ok. But a month ago It just hit mr all over again. The nightmares , anxiety and feelings of fear and hopelessness and crying.bive just to go on sick leave again. I just dont understand whsys gping on. So I totally get that you are still struggling as I too feel this will go on for ages . I cant see it ever being good again and I think my old happy self has maybe just gone forever. Hope you start feeling better but reading through various posts it seems like it’s a long, long road xx