Finding it hard.

Im finding it so hard after losing my dad in February. After we got told of my dads cancer diagnosis the day before he passed away.i know its still early days. But i cant seem to see a way forward. Living your life after they have gone and that the world still goes on without still not eating or sleeping and im rarely going out .how does one move forward. I feel like the future is do very bleak without my dad in it .how do you live without then here? Im still struggling with the fact we didn’t know he had cancer. Was there something i could have done.why didn’t my dad tell us he wasn’t feeling dad was very stubborn he didn’t like to worry people. If we had known earlier we could have had more time with him…i could have said all the things i wanted to say to him.i feel gulity for doing normal day to day things too. I feel bad for having moments when i feel good .

Hello there,
I am so sorry to hear about your Dad- this is hard. I lost my husband in January, so we have been bereaved for a similar length of time. And it is really hard, each day a battle, I know. Your Dad sounds a bit like my husband- private and stubborn. But also brave. They faced into the cancer in they way they knew. We have to live on now - tough and sad and difficult as it is - for them. They would want us to be happy so don’t feel guilty when you feel joy - as your Dad would be happy to see you smile and make progress along this road. People on this site understand how hard it is and are with you. Hold tight, I am, hoping things will get better soon.