I lost my Mum on her birthday in 2024 due to complications with cancer. Then seven weeks after her funeral my Dad committed suicide.
To make this situation worse both my parental and maternal families cut me off. I haven’t had any contact for two years. However I do have a loving and caring wife that helps me. Her family supports me too at times.
So far I haven’t been able to deal with the grief as my only sibling has produced a false will of my late Dad that basically hands over the entire estate to him. I have a solicitor onboard but getting any response from them is very difficult. The ones I’m using are the ones that my parents both used to hold their wills, so it seemed to make sense to use them. Two years later and I’m still fighting to get the fake will resolved and the estate dealt with. However in the meantime my sibling is living in our parents home, selling off what he can to just do as he pleases with.
Dealing with the grief and my sibling has been very detrimental to my mental health. I have struggled with depression and anxiety for a long time. Some of it down to my autism and some down to my disabilities.
I did try to have counselling with a well known support organisation that GP’s direct you to, but their style of counselling caused me to have an autistic meltdown.
I’m looking for support and if possible 1 to 1 or small group counselling in person or online. My preference would be in person.
Thanks in advance.
Mark
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Hi Mark
I’m so sorry your going through so much at the moment. It must be very difficult.
When you were referred for counselling through your GP did you speak to a social subscriber? I think that is who you need to speak to. They will know what’s available support wise in your area.
This group has kept me sane since I lost my husband nearly a year ago. The people here have become friends. We are not face to face and none of us are councillors but we all understand what it’s like to lose people we love.
Please join in with a conversation, post a question or just read old posts. That’s what I did and I’m so glad I did.
Take care, Helen x
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Helen
Thanks for your reply, it was the social prescriber that I saw and got referred by. She did refer us to someone else but after registering with them and explaining about my previous experience they said I couldn’t attend their grievance course the day before I was due to attend. They suggested I find somewhere that can support me on a 1 to 1 basis. I was told this via my wife and was told that they would email us but never did.
I’ll read through the posts on this forum as you have suggested.
Thanks, Mark.
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Hello Mark
I am sending you my condolences on the passing away of both your beloved parents. Your message was heartbreaking to read and the terrible situation aside from your grief, that you find yourself in the middle of, is appalling.
As you say any dealings with solicitors takes so long. I hope that before long you get the resolution you so thoroughly deserve.
I have struggled with grief and the passing away of my beloved mam 14 weeks ago. We lived together for 60 years and for the last three, mam had Alzheimer’s. She was doing well though. I miss her so much in so many ways.
I have tried all sorts to get counselling. Probably the same as you through my GP put me on to NHS Talking Therapies. They would not let me see them because they don’t do bereavement. I looked in the local areas at face to face counselling at local hospices, but you need a referral.
So early April I came on here and have been here ever since. Also, have you tried Marie Curie. They do a telephone volunteer support. They are great. I use them about twice a week and they can offer, which I have accepted, 6 sessions over the phone for 6 weeks with a volunteer counsellor. I have had three sessions. They do help me a bit.
I am sending you my kindest wishes and support. It is a heartbreaking tough time you have had and are having. Please keep your head up and I know you have the strength to get through it.
God bless. Stephen.
Hi Stephen
Thank you for your beautiful message, it got me quite emotional reading it.
Yes it’s been a really tough journey. It was Talking Therapies that I was referred to. At the time I was living near Winchester as we hadn’t sorted out getting together under one roof. I can’t recall much of the session. I came around in the A&E department in Winchester Hospital. They called my wife in Reading who doesn’t drive. She got the hospital to take me back home.
I keep chasing the solicitors and will be again this week. Last time I called them from the GP surgery with the social prescriber assisting me seemed to make more of an impact.
I find there are a lot of triggers that set me off still, like Mother’s and Father’s days, birthdays, Christmas etc.
Thank you again for your beautiful message.
Mark
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Hi Mark.
You are very welcome and thank you for your lovely reply. I truly appreciate it. If you feel like doing so at any time please leave a message on this post.
God bless and all the best to you. Stephen.