first birthday without mum

It’s my 21st birthday tomorrow, it’s my first one without my mum i lost her in february, i’m an only child she wasn’t just my mum, she was my best friend and my sister i don’t want to celebrate this year it just seems so hard knowing im not going to wake up with a card from her, the house won’t be decorated i won’t hear her sing happy birthday to me, i know i should try but i can’t process the fact she won’t be here with me, i just want my mum every year she’d decorate the house even when she had chemotherapy the next day she’d do it no matter what making sure i had the best day even though she must of been in so much pain, she’d go out of her way every year and for the first time in my life i won’t have any of that

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Thinking of you today @shootingstar. I’m so sorry your mum isn’t there to celebrate with you. It sounds like you’re coping with the day in a way that feels right for you. The community is here for you :blue_heart:

@shootingstar

Sorry to hear about the loss of your mum :smiling_face_with_three_hearts: bless you.

I haven’t got any advice for you but wanted to wish you a happy birthday for tomorrow. I hope you can celebrate a little on your 21st. As silly as that sounds.

Sending you hugs :hugs: x

I’m sorry you lost your mum :cry:
She sounds wonderful and caring. My mum was the same and always made a big fuss of me, always made me feel special. I haven’t been ready to lose that, I totally understand and my first birthday after I lost my mum was horrible, didn’t feel right at all without her. I still thought of her though and tried to do things to take my mind off my sadness. Try and go out and see people/friends/other family if u feel up to it. Or you could still do something that you used to do with her to feel close to her. Don’t put any pressure on yourself though, you can feel however you want to feel xx

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I am so sorry to hear this. I’m dreading the first birthday without mum. I am an only child too but have been lucky enough to have had my mum until I was 57. I do hope you find the strength to remember her love for you xxx