My sleep is awful. I can nap during the day but sleeping at night is impossible.
I’m getting unexplained, recurrent pain in my neck that makes it hurt to do anything other than lie down.
I either feel ravenous or not hungry at all.
I saw a picture of myself on social media this day 1 year ago and realised it was the last time I saw him alive.
I’m unbearably sad even though I know logically speaking that 366 days without him is no more or less significant than any of the other 366 days spent without him.
I’ve fallen out with my partner who I have been doing my best to support as his dad has had a stroke & is hospitalised. I wasn’t trying to argue and told him neither of us needs this but he kept arguing with me. All I’ve done is my best and I’ve done everything I can to help him.
I just want to curl up and hide until the world feels pleasant again.
I’m so sorry to hear about your grandad. It sounds as though things are very difficult at the moment and you are feeling sad.
I’m sure someone will be along to offer their support. You might already be familiar with our other Online Bereavement Support services, but if not, you can find out more about our Online Counselling service, our Grief Coach text support service, and our Grief Guide self-help tools by visiting the link.
You have got a lot on your plate! Far too much, in fact. Maybe try to sort out the sleeping and neck pain, by seeing your GP. Maybe they will be able to offer some bereavement support (or take up Alex’s offer). If that is successful your relationship and grieving issues will seem more manageable.
I love the old sayings, most of which have a lot of truth, such as : When you are up to your arse in alligators, its difficult to remember you were trying to drain the swamp.
Good luck, stay strong, and be positive about moving forward.