First Post A year has passed already

It is just over a year since i lost my soulmate suddenly on the morning of 30th August 2020. We had been laughing and joking that morning which still brings a wry smile to my face and tears to my eyes.

I popped out to cut the grass and was back in to see if she wanted a cuppa 20 minutes later. Went upstairs and my world collapsed. Katrina had her health problems, but nothing can prepare you for that moment. Making those phone calls to our children. Going and telling my parents that day is a blur.

As has been the following year I am still convinced it cannot be a year already. I have my moments where all i want to do is cry about how unfair this world is. We had been married 32 years and in my mid 50s was looking forwards to many more years to come.

Certain songs or films can trigger the memories. But I will get there wherever there may be.

On the anniversary of Katrina Passing i went out with our Children to three of Katrinas favourite locations and scattered her ashes as up till now it hadn’t seemed right for me.

We all have our own ways of dealing and will react differently.

I miss her and would give anything for one final moment with her.


Hello Iain, thank you for your post. I am sorry this happened to you and Katrina.
I don’t have anything worth saying in me right now at 4.22am but I just wanted to let you know I read your post and appreciate you making it.


Hi, I am replying to you both.
Iain, I am so very sorry that your soulmate had to leave and yes all you have written applies to me as well. Just to have same time to say all those things I didn’t say. My first year went quickly and in a blur most of the time. Even now I wonder how I have managed to survive.
Now FleurDeLis, you have been around long enough to know that at 4.22 a.m. you shouldn’t be on the internet, it won’t help you sleep and we all know if we sleep our grieving won’t be as bad. I sound like school teacher :rofl: so lesson for today has ended.
This grieving thing really is the pits but some days are better than others and tomorrow is a different day.
Take care of yourselves, both of you. Sending blessings S xxx


@SusieM that made me laugh thank you xxx I will try harder tonight :laughing: take care x


Pleased it worked.
I can only tell you what I do,
camomile tea
When I had counselling, they organised alternative therapies and I did have reiki, I did training and I use that which also calms me down.
I also have reiki sleep disc and that really works.
The last thing, I let my cat come onto the bed and she purrs which is guaranteed to work.

I think most people grieving suffer from poor quality sleep which becomes a habit along with a few other things that’s not good but I think we get to the stage we stop caring and that’s bad.
Always nice to see you have been posting.
Hope you sleep well, good night.

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Hi Ian, its over a year to for me. Its such a struggle. We are all bewildered, but sharing here, can be such a support.

6 months today since I loss my wife for 25 years. She’s just 50. Life was suppose to begin not end. It’s a crazy world. I too would give up everything to bring her back.