That’s it isn’t it @MandyC15
The irony of grief.
The one person who could advise us what to do is the one person who isn’t there.
Love, hugs and strength for another day without our soulmates and best friend
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MandyC15. I’m so sorry your husband has passed and it’s all so recent for you. The 11th May is my partners funeral anniversary if anniversary is the correct word. It’ll be a year. My head feels so frazzled still. How good of your husband to arrange where he wanted his belongings to go and also for a good cause. You did the right thing in holding the auction in your own time. Other people seem to totally not understand how you feel and often act like we’re being weird or something. I also saw your comment about friends. It’s the same for me. They just disappeared. Over 50 years of a pretend fake friendship. I see their true colours. I’ve blocked them. I wish I’d come to the sueryder page before because it’s been a loving helpful place where others truly do understand how you feel 
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Totally agree xx
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How insensitive of your mother they really don’t think.My friend has incurable cancer and her 84 year old mother expects her to take her shopping and days out.You look after yourself because at the end of the day very few will.
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She doesn’t know what to say and waffles on!
Are you feeling better yet???
No! And life will never be the same again 
Im not replacing Nick with my 75yr old mother and 80yr old uncle.
Id rather be on my own… it sounds nasty and selfish 
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It isn’t nasty or selfish at all. Many old people think they are entitled to everyone else’s help, they are the selfish ones. And I bet if you take into account the times when they have actually put themselves out for others when they were younger, it didn’t happen. My Mum is the same, she lost her parents in her 20s, her siblings dealt with all the caring, funerals, house clearing, etc as Mum was abroad, so she never did any of it. Now at 85 she seems to look at people to see what they can do for her, nothing else. I’m staying away until I want to deal with her, but that will be a while as I feel too fragile atm.
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Life will never be the same that’s so true.It doesn’t help when people are taking advantage of you either .
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Yeh they get like that when they’re older dont they ? 
can be very draining x
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Gosh, Mazy,
I empathize with all that you have said. It is coming up to the second anniversary of my partner’s death (3 June) and I am really dreading it.
It takes longer than 1 or 2 years to even begin to feel some kind of normality. I don’t think we ever get over losing a loved one and why should we? I was with my partner for over 20 years. That is a big chunk of anyone’s life. They leave such an imprint on our lives and a much cherished memory of who they were and what they meant to us.
Slowly, slowly, we learn to adapt to this new reality but there will be bumps along the way.
I was tidying up my bathroom yesterday and came across a Clangers birthday card Andrew got for me with a short but loving message inside. He really liked the Clangers and the card made me smile.
Give yourself plenty of time to grieve. Believe it or not, it is a healthy, normal reaction to a big (perhaps the biggest) loss we will ever experience.
The people on this forum are here for you for support and to lend a kind ear whenever you need it.
Take care,
With love and best wishes,
Sonia
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Definitely not selfish , my husband passed away on a Wednesday my mother had a go at me on the Sunday because her lunch was late I was not in any state to boil a egg let alone cook Sunday lunch my kind daughter in law did it when I took it to her she said it was too late and to take it back told her to put it in bin as my daughter in law was kind to do and would not upset her by taking it back Xx
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