I will help to hold the rope lol. Hugs Jo xxx
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Morning Dot, last year I had to have a operation for vulva cancer and 30 rounds off radio therapy. I am now on 6 monthly check ups and will be for the next 5 years. And if after that i keep getting the all clear i will be discharged.
Sorry you are also feeling down. This journey is awful, I talk constantly to Gra someone out loud sometimes just in my head.
Sending you hugs and hope today you are feeling just a little better. Jo xxx
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Really sorry to hear that, Jo. No wonder you get down in the dumps. Life just isn’t fair. I have got everything crossed for you. But you handle it admirably. I guess we all have to tell ourselves that it isn’t what life throws at us, it’s how we handle it, and you are doing just great.
It’s another miserable wet day here. The deluge at the weekend is still running off the fields and another storm is forecast. Definitely monsoon season. When you said you had got a dog, I thought about doing the same. But the thought of putting me wellies on and taking it for a paddle down my lane made me think again! Perhaps a pet duck would be more practical!
Xx
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Morning jane,
I do get down I have to be honest down and scared all at the same time. Gra was .y support i would never have got through it if it hadnt been for him and his daughter Michele, they stayed with me 24 hrs if one want there the other was as I said before I suffer agoraphobia and found it really difficult but the hospital put me in a side ward so they could stay.
My dog os called Millie she is a yorkshire terrier she gives me a purpose to get up each day.
Mmm now a duck is an intresting idea but can you get a lead to fit to take it for a walk? And can you sit it on your knee to atch tv with you. And please dont get a bath while its in you could get more than you bargain for lol xxx
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A pet duck that’s quackers.
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My sister had a pet duck. She rescued it from a pub garden when it was pestering a drunk man. He whacked it with a tray, she took it home. She really loved it. It hated men in jeans and would attack them. Men not wearing jeans were tolerated, women wearing jeans were tolerated.
It lived in my sister’s garden for years, she sank an old tin bath in the lawn. I used to call it “Lunch” and it would come waddling towards me. One day I told my sister that I had poured a bottle of orange squash into the bath “so that Lunch would taste better”! Dozy bugger believed me!
It died of old age.
Honestly!
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Lol your poor sister or was it the poor duck. How can people be so cruel it was a living thing. I will nevef understand the mentality of some people. Xxx
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Hi all, been dipping in and out of the forum for the last week or so, it really is hard work this grieving journey, I have had a few “good days” and generally a bit more of a calm period, you think you are getting somewhere, often with a guilt trip and then suddenly back down the ladder, it almost seems that during the better times you are carrying forward the sadness that will find a way to the surface at some point.
Ducks! I can highly recommend them, I have 3, at the moment, one is a recovered road traffic collision, one was acquired to keep her company, one (a boy) came from ebay as an unknown variety as an egg, must be kept in overnight, they are lost without a pond, mine have two!, preferably penned during the day as a fox is surely going to have a meal, I speak more quack than I do human language, yesterday I was calling (mimicking) the buzzards overhead and they responded! if someone phones I struggle to answer in the correct language, animals, birds, wildlife and nature as a whole has truly been my saviour and companion during my life and particularly the last 7 months since losing my wife.
Just had a large hail stone storm, some were literally the size of marbles! had to check the ducks but all was well as they were sheltered by some trees.
take care all and battle on.
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‘It seems that during the better times you are carrying forward the sadness that will find a way to the surface at some point’
My experience too. Thats a good way of putting it Swift.
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We have lots of buzzards and red kites here. I am always surprised what wimpy little cries they have considering they are big birds. The magpies and jackdaws sound much more fierce.
My mother in law did a good crow impersonation, she wasn’t even trying. It was just how she was.
Xx
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Lol willow I think most mother in laws are the same . Hugs jo xxxx
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Sending hugs xx
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We had 12 ducklings about 3 years ago. Mother duck dumped them on our pond, stayed around for a couple of days, then buggered off. I managed to keep them alive and fed until they were fully fledged. Then they wouldn’t go! All 12 would take off at dawn, then as the sun was setting, they all came back for their dinner. For months. They absolutely wrecked the pond, ate all my water lilies and marsh marigolds, crapped all over the grass, and trampled my flower bed. Hooligans, the lot of them. But I did love them.
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Hi Nala I know exactly how you are feeling, I lost my husband 14 weeks ago and I feel guilty I should have fought more because I do feel he was failed in his care.
I’m here anytime you want to talk
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The swamp has me firmly by the ankles and is pulling me down. I am feeling guilty as I have changed our car and had our lounge decorated, I had no qualms about doing this and felt Ray was telling me to do it but once it was done I feel as though I am erasing him. Our daughter says that he would be pleased with what I have done, it is the first time in all our 52 years together I have done something without consulting him. Sorry for rambling.
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We are coming for you Jane,I bought new bedding and sought advice whether to put it on the bed,so know how you feel,I was told your bedding won’t last forever and will eventually need to be changed,I think the same applies to your car and decorating,they wouldn’t last forever,I think your husband would agree,rope on its way.
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It’s a good thing to do. We are stuck with the life we have got, even though it isn’t what we wanted or expected. Instead of always thinking of what we have lost, eventually we have to think of what we still have left. Yesterday is gone, tomorrow isn’t guaranteed, today is all we have, and we should/must make the best life we can.
It is what I would have wanted my husband to do if I had gone first and I know that he would have wanted the same for me.
I know exactly how you feel, each bank account and utility bill that is changed to my sole name feels like he is being gradually erased and deleted. I still wake up every morning and feel that punch in the face, and I still go to bed and night aching for him.
But I also know that I have to get on with it. I refuse to let the grim reaper take my life as well as my husband’s. Only one of us died that day, I often wish it had been me. But I would not want my wonderful husband to be feeling this pain instead of me.
Onwards and upwards. Xx
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Such wise words @Willow112
I’m struggling a bit this morning. I don’t know why but it’s grey and gloomy outside
I woke up tearful.
Maybe because I’d been dreaming of him
But I don’t want the dreaming to stop.
Its all I’ve got of him now
That and my memories
Hugs to everyone x x
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Thank you Ron, I think the final straw yesterday was taking Ray off the Electoral Roll.
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Sending you a hug 
I went to bed in tears last night as I do most nights and I hate it.
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