So i lost my boyfriend on sunday 8th october
I havent been home sence im so scared to go home i dont no why i think if i went home i would expect him to come home what could i do to help me get through this xxxx
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Anthony,
I am sorry to hear about your loss and in particular because it is so recent.
The journey that we are on is a very long and painful journey with no quick fix for any of us, over time you will find that what works for someone else may not work for you. Just now the one thing that might help is by posting on here or even just reading other peoples stories.
Like you I hate being at what was a loving home for me and my wife,in fact every single day since she died I get up in the morning,take a quick shower and then jump in my car and park up somewhere then walk. I sometimes come home at lunchtime for a brief period then away I go again until teatime. I feel too much pain being here for any longer than I need to.
I see no sense in trying to suggest ideas as to how you could push yourself to go home,you should only do it when you have the strength but it’s worth mentioning that once you do it the first time you may find it easier the next time.
The advice that I received was to take things literally an hour at time,don’t push too hard and be as kind to yourself as you can
Support from family and friends can be a great help in the early days so if you can then try lean on them or those of your partner if there are any. Take care and keep posting on here.
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Hi mike i will definitely do what u say as never been in this situation before so will give it ago for sure and i do have peeple to lean on thankyou for reading this and thankyou for replying to means alot x
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I m really Sorry to hear of your loss I can see this only happened a short time ago so be patient with yourself My husband died abroad in May and it took me quite a while to actually believe it really happened and he would never come home again
Try and get someone to go with you to the house who understands and can offer real support even for a short time I am sure it will be a very painful experience but you can’t avoid it forever Thinking of you Hope u can manage it soon
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I guess we are all different, I feel safe at home, I make myself go out as a walk and fresh air is good, but I always make a dash for the safety of home
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I am so sorry for your loss, it is very early days yet. I’m just coming up to 11 weeks and it’s still so hard coming home and realising he is not here and is not coming back. It is so hard but I am slowly adjusting to the loneliness. I have continued to talk to him, discussing tv programmes we used to enjoy together, I’m sure people would think I was nuts but it helps me, I often cry wishing we were enjoying them together but it is getting easer as I build up my new normality. Give yourself time, we all find ourselves different ways of coping, some days are better than others. Stay strong and take it one day at a time
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I do talk to my boyfriend every night deep down it helps me i will just have to do it when i go home
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