Goodnight Dad

So, I lost my dad on Monday. He was a man with a good heart, who often gave more of himself than he had to give. He made mistakes along the way when I was younger and we had a period of not-speaking, something he acknowledged and more than redeemed himself over, especially in these last few years. He was and will be remembered as a good man, with a big heart who was kind to others.

He was very ill a little over a year ago and has been ‘running on fumes’ ever since, not quite managing to get that little bit healthier that might have gotten him back on track, and I believe he just ran out of oomph, as his mind and wit were still very sharp.

The strange thing is, it still feels like something that’s happened to somebody else; like he will text me any minute asking if the new NCIS boxset is out yet, or to tell me to “B.Safe” and while I know he won’t, logically, I still keep wanting to call him to check. It makes no sense at all.

I know that it’s going to take time to process this, and I’m lucky that I have some very supportive people around me, both personally and at work, but i was told that coming on here might be of some help. So here I am.

Regards,

J.L

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It sounds like your dad means so much to you, it is so important to have had such a good relationship.

I lost my dad in February very suddenly & I can honestly say that how you are feeling totally makes sense to me.

I expect my dad to text all the time telling me to say “channel 5” knowing that when I change it his favourite film would be on.

I often have to think & stop myself just texting him like I always would when something happens that I know he would like.

I find it really helps to talk about it, I find this site helpful as others have gone through or are going through similar things which not many people I know have.

I am sorry this has happened to you & I do hope you are as well as you can be.

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I’m sorry that you lost your dad. With mine, it shouldn’t have been a surprise, given how I’ll and weak he’d been, but it’s always a shock. I hope you are able to find your way forward too. They say time heals, but they don’t say how much…and I don’t think any of us have that much time in the first place.

Blessings to you.

JL. X

I think it would always be a shock regardless of the circumstances. We just believe they will always be here & never think about them going.

I hope you are managing, I’m not sure it’s something we will get over so much as something we learn to cope with.

I got my dads tattoo in the same place today so today is a good day for me

Sean

That’s lovely. I’m going to get a tattoo for my dad at some point soon. I’m glad you’re had given you some positivity today.

JL. X

Hi,

I lost my dad last February to cancer and although myself and family could see him deteriorating we still didn’t think the passing of him would be so so hard! Nearly 18months on and I’m still struggling to accept that he’s gone. I was a daddy’s girl and when my dad was diagnosed with cancer it hard me quite hard and I made sure I went to hospital appointments scans etc with himself and also my mum. Since my dads passing both myself and my mum have sold up and moved in together and I can see that we’re both struggling although we put on brave faces and I have my toddler daughter to keep me smiling but deep down I just miss my dad so much!! I thought joining this page might help as it’s speaking to someone other than family xx

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