That’s beautiful and so true 
It is so true, home is where the heart is and our hearts are now broken so we have no home.
Every day comes with a new realisation of what we have permanently lost. I looked at his photo this morning and it’s so unreal…I just whispered where are you? When it is a sudden unexpected death time freezes from when you last saw them and there doesn’t seem to be an in-between time because we had no time to prepare. I just remember him leaving here in an ambulance and me carrying on has normal thinking he will be home later, he had probably caught a virus. Never in my wildest dreams think he would die
Yes it’s so unreal. Every morning I wake with a sinking feeling knowing it’s another day I have to get through without him.
I’m only 11 weeks into this nightmare now called my life. Keep hoping one day soon the sinking feeling will start to ease. X
I often wonder if it will get any easier? I feel like I have no purpose or direction in life now. It’s just a sad existence, it’s not living. I am finding it hard to know what to do with myself all day and night. Nothing feels right and I feel totally disconnected from the world. I have had 6 weeks off work and I know I have to go back soon but even that fills me with dread but I need something to get up for each day. I have an elderly dog who is my world and he is deteriorating now as he has lung disease and I pray each day I don’t lose him yet as it would totally tip me over the edge.
It’s only walking him that forces me out the house for his walks
Your situation is so similar to mine. I really don’t have any motivation or purpose for anything any more, and yes is so hard to know how to fill the days. I try to arrange to meet a friend for a coffee or a walk each day just to get me out of the house. I’ve also got an old dog, who’s thankfully healthy, and I keep telling her she needs to stay that way!!
I find weekends worse as everyone seems to have ‘family’ stuff going on, so are seldom free to meet up. Thankfully I have my children living with me still so there is some company. But they are in their 20’s so do their own thing most of the time and don’t fill the feeling of loneliness.
I’ve not been back to work yet, but likewise feel I should just to get some structure back into the day. Just not sure I’m ready yet, I get anxious just thinking about it at the minute.
I get fed up of people keep telling me it’s only early days, and to take things one day at a time, but I suppose in the grand scheme they are right.
Getting out for a walk is good for us and have to admit I do feel better for getting out of the house for a while. Just got back from a walk. Couldn’t believe how warm it is today xx