grief before death

My Mum has been battling with a degenerative lung disease, she had some plateau point but is now in a care home as she was told on her last hospital stay that she can no longer go home.
I am not coping well at all, my mood swings are all over the place and it is ruining my relationship with my fiance, can anyone offer any advice? I find myself drinking to excess occasionally and we have huge fights.
Does any have any advice for me or my other half?

Hi, I can understand how you are feeling regarding your mums condition and I also feel for your fiancé because he is taking the brunt of your feelings. Please try to take each day as it comes because non of us know what tomorrow will bring. See as much of your mum as you can but also think about the damage all your emotions are doing to yourself. Please just take and take relax on the alcohol it is a drug. S xxx

Ha e you thought of writing down your feelings - or writing a letter to your wife may help.

You’ve identified the problem, a few problems :slight_smile:
Sometimes that’s the hardest thing.

What do you want to change?
How are you going to do it?

For me journalist helped me through my wife’s terminal illness, then death.
I found it can give perspective, first,of all you have to allow the mess tomget,out of your head. Writing worked for me

Thanks Willowyman,

I have actually started writing, I don’t know if the kind of writing i am doing is helpful with trying to work out my feelings or my grief but I do find it relaxes me

I am currently signed off of work and trying to keep myself occupied while also spending as much time as I can with my Mum, I am keeping my focus on house projects as I am falling apart a bit!

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Yeh,it’s not easy :slight_smile:if it relaxes you then it seems like it’s working!