I’m about halfway between Treharris and Methyr town.
Have you ever been to any spiritualist churches in the area? Do you have any interest in what happens after death or the afterlife? I’d never actually thought about until I lost him, now it’s all I ever think about 
I used to be into spiritualism and i have been to the churches years ago but i never found a psychic that i found was any good but i will go have a reading in the future as i will know if they connect with my wife or not. Its too soon for me now tho but i know how your feeling as when she passed i constantly said if only i could talk to her.
How long were you and your wife together? I was with my partner 17 years. I feel like I’ve lost a limb without him 
I just can’t see a way forward without him at the moment.
We had so many routines. We were like an old married couple 
Because we had so many routines I think to myself we’d be doing this now 
I think it makes it harder in some ways.
Firefly ,I believe Bridgend carers centre, park street do a bereavement group and support .
You might like to have a look at the web site for contact details.
17 years is such a long time wow.
I met my wife 13 years ago we were together for a bit then she moved away until we got back together in 2015 married in 2017. She was the most amazing person in the world she called me her princess and treated me like one. She loved my sons ( i have 2) like her own. We were soulmates. I really struggle living without her plus my health has got a lot worse with grief i feel about 100 years old.
I really struggle living without him too. I miss him so much. We were quite active and spent lots of time outdoors but now I just want to lie in bed thinking about
everything constantly It’s weird because it really feels like he’s coming back, obviously I know he’s not but the feeling that he’s coming back just won’t go.
I know exactly what you mean
I’m 38 and I feel like I’ve aged a good few years too. My hair was falling out in clumps at the beginning, thankfully that’s stopped but I swear my grey hairs have doubled since he’s gone
Do you get on well with her family?
Hi
I feel like that at the moment that my partner is coming home and that it’s not real. Reality will hit me no doubt when we have the funeral. 
life is so sad and lonely without your soulmate and best friend
I cant even go in the garden and enjoy the nice weather as she was always out there she loved the sun and everytime i look at where she sat i just sob. I am over the thinking she will come home now i just get the overwhelming reminders how much i miss her therevare so many reminders thats shes not here anymore. I get on with her mum and brother but her mum is really suffering and not coping i havnt seen her physically since the funeral but we message every week.
Just take your time dont rush anything it will go in a blur so just make sure you look after yourself x
I’m the same re the garden. We hadn’t long done the garden, we’d lie out there on our loungers on a sunny weekend evening and have a few glasses of wine just chilling. It was perfect 
We have a couple of planters that we use for flowers and growing veg. It was something we would do together. Up until we had our veg planters I never really had any interest in gardening, when we started doing it together it became a bit of a competition
It just doesn’t interest me anymore since he’s gone
The day before she passed, which is coming up july 15th we were out in the garden we had a subway delivered a picnic in garden then we played cards it was a lovely day. But now the garden is just too much of a reminder or her.
Did your wife die suddenly?
My OH just went completely out of the blue, it still doesn’t feel real. I have videos of him with his voice on but I just can’t bring myself to watch them To see him so alive just hurts too much and I can’t keep it together
I’m at the twelve week stage today. I can’t believe I’ve actually made it to three months without him. This has been the hardest thing I’ve ever been through in my entire life. I honestly didn’t think I’d get through the first few weeks.
How are you coping now? Are you still struggling? Part of me hopes that one day I’ll be ok and I can enjoy life again but he was the best thing to ever happen to me and I don’t want to grow old without him 
I would be interested in this maybe an online group
Yes she passed away suddenly i done cpr for half an hour then paramedics came but couldnt save her i dont know why she passed yet tho she was only 32. I have ptsd from that day and until i find how why she passed il keep beating myself up that maybe i could of done something. Im still struggling i am crying less tho. I dont have any family or friend’s around just my two sons one 23 the other 16.
I dont think il ever enjoy life like i did with her i just get on with it because i have to stay for the boys.
Its true what people say you dont get over it you just learn to live with the pain.
Sorry for your loss gaz. Perhaps i could start an online group to start il look into it. Thank you for replying.
I can only imagine how horrendous it was to have to perform CPR on her yourself. I have no first aid training so I wouldn’t have a clue what to do if I was ever in that position. It would be bad enough performing CPR on a stranger but to have to perform it on someone you love, I can’t even imagine
I’m not surprised you have PTSD.
Please don’t beat yourself up though. I’m sure you did everything you could. It’s easy for me to say because I haven’t been in your position. My heart goes out to you it really does.
I don’t have any family around, my mam and grandparents are dead, my father has never been around and I have a brother but he would be more trouble than support.
His family have been brilliant though.
I don’t think I’ll ever enjoy life again either. Everything seems so pointless now. I go through the motions but life has no meaning. I don’t want to spend the rest of my life sad and pining for him but it’s very early days for me and I know it’s not something that’s going to get better anytime soon. This is something that will stay with me for the rest of my life. I’m 38 now, I often wonder what I’ll be like when I’m 45, 50. Will I still be missing him and wishing he was here as much as I do now or will I slowly miss him less and less as time goes on? I don’t want to miss him kess though. I always want to love him as much as I do now
My brother died when i was a teenager he was 17 so theres no other siblings. I cut my mother out of my life due to past trauma and her being so narcissistic. There isnt anyone else. I was actually fine being without family when i had my wife.
Now i cant leave the house alone as i am disabled i suffer with seizures and a neurological disorder which with my wife passing away has made my life more difficult.
I dont think we will ever stop missing them no matter how many years pass by its coming up to the 1st year for me and thats a day im dreading.
Yes fabulous idea.i lost my girlfriend to cancer last Saturday im desperate to talk to local people on the same position.please keep me posted.sgane
So sorry for your loss. Hopefully we can get something together if there is enough interest i find talking helps grief is very lonely.
