I think when you’re feeling fragile and vulnerable its really hard to reach out to someone- i think subconsciously you fear rejection. I dont think people the other side of the grief fence realise.
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I agree. We shouldn’t have to ask. But if we do, then we should. Texting them with something like “I need you” or “I need your company” could be all it takes for them to realise.
That sounds promising, it sounds like they value you as an employee and hopefully it will be in the near future 
I’ve got my line manager and HR coming on 14th March for a “chat”.They’ll see at my worst as I’m so anxious in the morning
I’m awake again at 12.30 and my head feels like it’s going to explode, I am so tired of this waking up at this time, I literally waited till 10 to go asleep though it was about 5 am I am so exhausted my head hurts.
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As you had your counselling session yest its possible your head was still trying to process everything from earlier. Generally when the mind races at night, its actually doing that all the time but we only notice at night because we finally stop doing stuff and theres no distraction. Has your counsellor suggested any relaxation exercises at all? What do you do when you wake up - have you tried listening to music, audio books, sleep stories? It might be worth a try. Also if possible it might be helpful if you can squeeze in some time before bed for yourself (i know that might be tricky) just to decompress and let the brain switch off. Im no caffeine after midday, and do series of stretches before bed to try and help me sleep (also to help with my headaches).
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Hi @Lisa_L51
I read your post at about 4am with the same symptoms you described. Have you tried meditation? I find this helps me to get to sleep and then when I wake at stupid o’clock I use it again to get me back off. There’s loads on YouTube to choose from but I find the mindful movement really good. It’s not a magic cure but it’s a little help. Hope you’re having an ok day 
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@Ally6 is right @Lisa_L51 your mind will be processing your counselling session. I hope you are managing to rest today.
Mention your sleep when you next have an appointment with GP or mental health nurse.
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Today has been full on at work. I just don’t want to be hear. Today makes 6 months since my mom died. How have I got through it? I just don’t know. I miss her more and more each day. My heart is just breaking. 
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Hugs. You’re not alone, it feels like I miss dad more and more too. I thought it might get better in spring, but it’s worse with the light and the flowers coming up. 
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Your doctor can refer you for counselling but these is a wait I waited 9/10 weeks for mine x
Your not alone I feel the longer it’s been the more I’m missing my mum, I been into work today for a visit to have a coffee with my work colleagues it was ok, stayed for a good 1 1/2 hours and I’ve just come to my dad’s to have lunch with him kids will be home from school soon, didn’t get much sleep again and I never moved till 12 I just couldn’t be bothered it’s getting harder and harder each day as time goes on x
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Hi I’ve spoken to my doctor he originally gave me mirtazpine to take of a night but they knocked me out and made me feel rough the next day and because I have to be on call for the kids and my dad I couldn’t take them x
It’s not so bad going to sleep it’s staying asleep that’s the problem and then sometimes it’s the opposite. I’m like a walking zombie I’m that tired I could sleep standing upright,
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There are ther things they can give you that won’t completely knock you out. I used to take that, I slept so well with them. Do talk to him again. If you can’t sleep then it will really affect you and make you feel worse.
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Do you know what they were called x
My GP gave me some diazepam. They won’t give you lots and i didn’t take it every night. But it helped me to relax and get some sleep when I needed it most.
Hope you have a better day today, sending hugs 
Thank you, day off. But I have parents evening tonight 
3 hours of non stop talking. Not in the mood.
Just had to drop my daughter to an employability workshop. 1 hour round trip.
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You’re very busy, Becca 
. Rest as much as you can 
.
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I’m about to finish my first week back at work. I’ve done 3 mornings and will do the same next week. If I was to sum up, I’d say that it’s been OK and manageable. But I feel like I would rather not have to work, and instead I’d have the brain space to continue trying to process what’s happened, and thinking about my lovely dad.
We learnt this week that my boss who is a similar age to me and who recently lost both his parents has handed in his notice, with no new job lined up. He’s taking a break from work.
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