My mum died back in June 2022. It was unexpected and traumatising. I’ve since become a mum myself.
I thought as time passed I’d start to feel like I could manage the grief better but it actually feels like it’s getting worse. Each day seems to remind me of how much I’ve lost and that forever without my mum is what lies ahead now.
I hate every “special” occasion because mum’s not there. I still find it hard to believe I’ll never talk to mum again, never hear her voice, never have her cuddle me and tell me she loves me. The future just feels pretty hopeless and full of pain. I do try very hard to be happy for my daughter and to enjoy my time with her, but even the baby is a constant reminder of the person who should be here to share all of this with me.
I feel so alone without my best friend.
I’m so sorry to hear about the loss of your mum. It sounds as though things are very tough at the moment and you are feeling alone and struggling with your grief.
I’m glad that you’ve been able to share how you are feeling here and I hope that you find the community a good source of support. Everyone here has experienced the loss of a loved one and will understand some of what you are going through.
I’m sure someone will be along to offer their support, but I wanted to share a few Sue Ryder resources with you that may help you right now.
Our Grief Guide self-help platform which has information, resources and advice to help you through your grief
Our Grief Coach text service, which sends you personalised text support via SMS
@AC93 - my friend, you lost your mum at the very moment you needed her the most, when you became a mother yourself. This is hard, really, really hard. I know what you mean by life being forever without now. The way I handle my loss is to talk to my husband all the time. I tell him what is happening, how things are going and I feel him close to me. Love endures all things, even death. Your mum’s love is all around you, and within you. Her strength and example have guided you all your life and made you who you are. Maybe speak with your health visitor or GP about how you are feeling - as you are dealing with a heck of a lot all at once. Please don’t go through this on your own. Your friends on here are with you x
@Vancouver thank you for talking to me. I do talk to mum quite a lot and wear an urn necklace containing some of her ashes every day. I just wish I’d appreciated her more while she was alive and shown her how much she meant to me. I thought we’d have so much more time.
I’m sorry about your husband. Take care x