Hi
I’m new here, mostly because I am grieving the loss of my mum (a yr ago this week), have been working with Health in Mind since December after I got to the point of being so lonely and shut-off from people I couldn’t cope anymore.
I shut-off from everybody the day my mum died, mostly because people are so bloody British and don’t like to talk about death, and I don’t want to be a burden.
Apart from my amazing CBT therapist, I don’t feel I can, or have, anybody to talk to. I feel so lonely, and but feel like I’ve got everything bottled up inside that I feel I’m going to explode.
Thought I’d give this a go in an attempt to try to take some of this pressure off.
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Sorry to hear about your loss. I find it very useful to express myself on this forum, so hopefully you will too. You will find very kind people here, who will understand what you are going though.
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Thank you for your message. I’ve had a couple of messages back already, and have found it helpful just opening up to anybody xx
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I have been on here several years after loss of parents. loving wonderful people, only child so loss was profound.
grief classes helped a lot. therapy did too so glad you are seeing someone.
this is s a great board. you are not far along in this loss. so you might be surprised how much longer you will seek help.
losing parents is the worst chapter in life, unless it is spouse or child. even ranks with that, I assume. I know it is natural but it is nonetheless devastating. the world become a cold wilderness without them.
and then you see how awful society really is, or can be. it is a real growing up time, losing parents. now I have to go find a new boyfriend and dread it. but I have to.
your healing will take lots of time so go easy.
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Hi Berit
Thanks for your message, and kind words.
I kind of know what you mean - I’ve found it really hard despite being the middle sister, the other two were not/have not been around.
It feels harder this week than last year - I just feel nothing, numb and lonely. Last year I had a purpose - I had to sort all the documents, details and plan the funeral, this year all I’ve been is a lethargic lump. All I want to do is hide away, but I’m a teacher so there is no hope of that!
Hoping it does get easier after the first one.
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I also know what you mean re society…I’ve deffo found out I only have a couple of true friends - the rest have run and hidden from the moment it was EOL.
I’ve started seeing a lovely woman, but I just don’t feel I can open up to her about all of this. I feel so lonely and like there is nobody to talk to or offload to. In the last year I’ve seen how people are around death - they run a mile. It’s so hard. I hope you do find a boyfriend and I hope you can open up to him, and more importantly, he understands you.
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I lost my dad in 2021. I lost my 28 yr old son in 2024. There is nothing that breaks a heart more than losing a child. I can only imagine how bad it must be to lose a child to sudden death or suicide. Sometimes I feel this world is a very dark and lonely place.
This site does show you however that you are not alone. So grateful for it. X
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I am so terribly sorry. that is an enormous loss. 
I just shake my head at what can happen in life.
I wish you the very best.
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