It’s almost six months since my husband died after being diagnosed with a Glioblastoma brain tumour in Nov ‘21. I watched the man I had spent 28 years with fade away before my eyes.
The grief seems to be getting worse. I have flashbacks to the most traumatic events.
The good weather we’re having seems to make things worse.
Dear Nathan, I am so sorry for your loss. I lost my husband suddenly in February after being together with him for about 26 years, married for 15 years and two months. I saw him dying in front of me after he told me that he loves me. Our house was full of ambulance staff, and police. And then the funeral director came to pick him up. The neighbours were gathering in front of our house asking if they can help me but I wanted to be on my own. I still cannot believe that my beloved husband is not coming back. It is an everlasting nightmare we are all trapped in and we actually do not live anymore - we are just existing. And yes, you are right I think also that the sunshine makes everyting worse. Sending lots of love and hugs.
Hi @Nathan,
It seems this sunny weather is making a lot of people sadder, I guess it’s because we see so many people enjoying it with their loved ones, & of course we feel the empty spaces more.
My mom passed away 2 years ago from a brain tumour, because of COVID we looked after her at home, as you say, it was very traumatic.
Sending hugs of support.
It’s those last couple of days that haunt me… everything seemed to suddenly speed up so that by the time my son and I arrived my husband was beyond saying goodbye. He’d told me several times to never feel guilt and up to then I hadn’t, but the sedation must’ve dipped as he became very agitated. I haven’t been able to say it up to now but it was as if he was put to sleep …I feel I let him down right at the last minute. Now tears are falling again because I’ve
finally admitted it.
I lost my mum in July 2020. She lived with me for 10 years. She collapsed and we couldn’t get her up so called 111. An ambulance was sent. I couldn’t go in the ambulance because of Covid. She was in hospital for 2 weeks and we couldn’t visit. After these 2 weeks we were told she had brain cancer and within a week of coming home she died.
I miss her immensely and sometimes my grief is overwhelming. I cry often and feel very lonely at times.
Sometimes it feels like it was only yesterday.
Grieving sucks big time.
Dear Zellie, I am so sorry for your loss. Losing a partner or family will always leave a big hole in our lives. We just learn to adapt to the pain and loneliness and despair but it never goes away. Sending lots of love and hugs to you and your daughter including your cats.
Dear Annaessex
Thank you for your kind words. I agree the sunny weather doesn’t help. Sending love and hugs
Did I really imagine summer weather would make a difference? I said at the time that I wanted to crawl into winter and stay there 'til spring but as you say, it doesn’t matter a fig.
I am also feeling sad due to the nice weather. I felt low enough during the winter but could cosy up. Christmas is difficult though as we used to drive around to see who had lights up and have a nice pub meal.
I wish I knew what to say as I am also having the same issue
My husband was dying during the summer Covid lockdown in 2020 - the weather was lovely and somehow it felt like the world was sharing my anticipatory grief. The winter part after he had gone was hell though.
My mother died of Covid and Cancer in February 2021 and until October 2022, I was very busy dealing with things.
The winter over 2022/23 wasn’t great but since March 2023, I have felt in a void