I’m struggling, Alan was my life, he did everything in the home, bills etc, I sit in the garden or inside and it’s over welming it’s all mine to look after, I feel like I’m drowning
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It is scary. I feel the same, my husband died suddenly 9 weeks ago. He did all the banking, computer stuff, and he was very practical, fixing everything. And I just sat back and let him.
I feel as if I have been cast adrift up a certain creek without a paddle.
I am determined to learn how to do things for myself. Sometimes I do okay. Other times I screw up. It feels like lots of things have suddenly gone wrong, although I suspect that it always happened and he just fixed them without saying anything.
When I am feeling particularly desperate I try to concentrate on what I would want him to do if it was me that had died.
I would want him to look after our daughter as best he could. That would mean keeping the house clean, shopping and cooking meals, washing clothes and trying to give her a happy life. In order to do that he would have to look after himself and not give in.
So that is what I am trying to do. I often fail, but I am doing my best. Xx
So sorry to hear of your loss, it’s really hard when all the responsibility is suddenly all yours, I sit in the garden and get over come with it. I made a memory bear from Alan’s clothes which I hold so he feels closer, not sure if it makes it worse or not.
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I’m sure both our hubby’s are looking down on us and saying we are doing fine. This grief just comes like a huge wave and en gulfs us.
Mine will be 8 weeks on Sunday, i live alone and struggle with agrophobia and panic attacks, my husband was so practical kept me on the straight road. Now i feel as if I have no purpose anymore i sit here for hrs reading all your posts trying to gain strength from you all. I do have family but i dont get any support from them. I have rang the doctors to be told its early days, I have been in touch with cruise and am on a waiting list. I also ring the Smartins for someone to cry too. Never felt such pain and anguish. I am so lonely .xxx
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It’s so so hard, my heart goes out to you, until this happens to you no one can understand the pain we feel. Like you my hubby did everything, we had been saying I should help, but time was against us. Always here to chat ok.
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