Hi, I’ve just lost my beautiful mum and I’m missing her so much. I have my dad to help look after who has MND but each time I walk into the house I become so upset.
I don’t know how to deal with my emotions and asked my GP to help but they have refused and said talk to my family and friends.
I was wondering if anyone on here could provide some advice or help in anyway please.
Thank you x x
Hello @Wheel75 ,
I can see that you’re new to the community, so I wanted to say that I am so sorry for the loss of your mum that brings you here.
I’m sure someone will be along to offer their support, but I wanted to share a few Sue Ryder resources with you that may help right now.
- Our Grief Guide self-help platform which has information, resources and advice to help you through your grief
- Our Grief Coach text service, which sends you personalised text support via SMS
- Our free Online Bereavement Counselling which is held via video chat
- Our Bereavement Information pages which can walk you through what you are going through.
Thank you again for sharing – please keep reaching out and know that you are not alone.
Take care,
Alex
Im so sorry for your loss @Wheel75 , and im shocked that your gp just turned you away without at least signposting you to some options.
Counselling therapy is generally not advised in the very early weeks after loss, because the pain is just too raw - your mind needs time to process whats happened - so a lot of services dont advise counselling until around 3 months. But what IS needed in those early stages of grief is emotional support - help to cope with the storm of emotions you’re dealing with. I lost my mum 9 months ago and i remember just how desperate i felt. And you have the added responsibility of taking care of your Dad as well - i really feel for you 
If you do have family and friends you can talk to, then of course do that. But other suggestions i would make (which the GP could have done) are to check out what bereavement support groups are in your local area. Every location varies, they might be offered by your local hospice, funeral director, or a local church so you might need to do a bit of online searching. Sue Ryder also run “grief kind” spaces in some locations. If you can find a support group it gives you the chance to connect with people in similar situations and help you feel less alone. In addition, are you in contact with any carer support organisations in relation to your Dad? It might be worth contacting them to see if they offer anything for both of you. A final suggestion is if you are employed, ask what support your employer offers - some companies offer employee assistance programmes with 24/7 helplines and possible access to counselling.
For those really tough moments where youre desperate to talk to someone, there are helplines which you can call:
Cruse 0808 808 1677 - weekdays
CALM 0800 58 58 58 - evenings
Samaritans 116 123 - 24 hours
I hope all this information is useful . Take it one day at a time and dont think too far ahead. Rest when you need to, eat whatever you can manage - try and look after yourself physically as grief is a whole body experience. If you feel the need to cry, scream, wail just do it. But equally if you get periods of numbness thats normal too - everyones grief is different. Youll find plenty of people on this site who understand and want to support each other, so just keep posting.
Sending hugs and strength to you 
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