Its 2 weeks since I lost my husband. I am overwhelmed with grief.
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Brownie, I am so sorry that your husband died. It is a nightmare, isn’t it? These early days are the absolute worst. We know. Numb, scared, exhausted, sad, crying, in a fog, confused, sleepless, can’t eat, worried, heartsick, physical pain - all experienced by each of us. I’ve learned here that all of this is normal and it was good to know I wasn’t going over the edge.
You aren’t either.
My advice is to live each day hour by hour and not think of the future. It is going to happen anyway and grieving over it now is useless. You will live it everyday and somehow you will get through it. You are living your future now, crappy as it is.
Pay the bills, feed yourself and the pets, and cry your eyes out. The tears will stop one day. You won’t feel this bad forever - that is a fact. Step by step you will begin to function again. It is hard, but you can do it. We are all doing it even though stumbling. Read the post “Two Weeks of Widowhood” and you will find many of us charting our experiences, good and bad.
Make a list of 5 things you must accomplish each day, do them and mark them off the list. It is a physical reminder that you are not stagnating in a puddle of tears. 5 things a day, 35 a week, 150 a month and with very little effort.
Reach out to friends and family. All the people who say “what can I do?” really want to help. Let them. Even if it is just going to the grocery store with you, let them. Lean on them for a while.
It was weeks before I opened the blinds on the windows and 9 weeks before I visited someone in their home. Week 10 - I went to lunch with a friend and to a Christmas display in the park - at night. I’ve had good days where I laughed and enjoyed myself.
You will figure it out. Just not yet and certainly not all at once. Give yourself the time to adjust. You will.
Much love.
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Thanks. It’s bad.