Grieving 22 years later

Is there any help available on the NHS for grief counselling? My brother died when I was 16 -22 years ago- and I’m still have days where it eats me up. I’m disabled and often bed bound, I never had a close family, living on my own from the age of 13 but my brother lived next door and we looked after each other, he was 9 years older but had autistic spectrum disorders. In the last few years I’ve realised I’ve never death with his death properly - at the time I escaped into a world of drugs and just tried to get on with life. Now often I just am in tears feeling the pain I felt all those years ago with the same intensity. Does anyone know where I may get some help to deal with the grief even though it is so long after his death? Thank you

Hi
I am sorry for the loss of your brother and that you are suffering. I lost my partner 3 months ago and have found being on this site really helps me and i dont feel so alone.
In terms of support from listening to people on here it varies. I went to my gp amd was referred to counselling waited 8 weeks and then told i was not eligible but others have had counselling and helped them so i think to go and see your gp would be your first step. There are bereavement support groups as well and again varies to where you live. I go to a group and find it helps me and they just “get it”. So worth finding out was is available locally.
This site has been invaluable to me you can post anytime of the day or night have a rant or a moan and you will not be judged as we are all in this horrible place together and support each other.
Hope this helps and you find some support for your loss and the time doesnt matter
Take care
Carol x

I’m so sorry to hear about the loss of your brother. It can certainly be the case that if someone doesn’t deal with a loss at the time, or blocks out their emotions, it can come back and affect them much later.

The first step to getting support on the NHS is to make an appointment with your GP - they can refer you to counselling or support services in your local area.

It’s never too late to seek support, and I’m glad that you’ve been able to take the first step of writing some of it down here. You will find there are lots of supportive people here who are dealing with the loss of a loved one. We actually had another user post just recently about the loss of their brother, also 22 years ago. They are called ballinluig, and you may be interested to read and reply to their post, here: https://support.sueryder.org/community/life-after-bereavement/bereavment-22-years-later

If there’s anything I can help with, or you have any questions about this site, just let me know.

Priscilla
Community Manager

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