I lost my sister in June 2023 from cancer. Just before Christmas I lost my mother-in-law, and this week I have been informed my eldest sister is now in end of life care.
I have not completely mourned my sister passing, and struggling to deal with my mother-in-law whilst also supporting my husband. Now to find out my older sister is dying, it’s all far too much. I don’t know how to keep functioning, in particular working as I work in a highly stressful job.
Any support or guidance would be much appreciated.
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Hello @StuBray,
I’m Seaneen and I can see that you are new to the community - I’d like to thank you for bravely starting this thread and sharing how you are feeling.
I’m sorry to hear about the losses you have experienced, and your sister now being terminally ill. That is such a lot to cope with.
Most community members have sadly experienced the death of a loved one and so will understand some of what you are going through.
I’m sure someone will be along to offer their support, but I wanted to share a few Sue Ryder resources with you that might be helpful.
I really hope you find the community helpful and a good source of support and I also hope you feel you can access more support should you need it.
Thank you again for sharing – please keep reaching out and know that you are not alone.
Take care,
Seaneen
Hi, I recently lost my older sister to cancer far too early and far too quickly. This followed six months of various bad news and stress and, as a family, we’re been left reeling. I too work in a high pressure job.
I don’t have any answers but I can say it’s ok to acknowledge that it feels too much, to take some time out, reduce responsibilities or let people know you’re having a challenging time. I’ve found a lot of support, which I switch on/off on my own terms (sometimes I don’t walk to talk about it at all).
My husband and I also took off for a few days and it helped re-energise me (a bit), being in different surroundings and ignoring real life for a few days. Not sure if this is an option for you.
Good luck with everything and look after yourself.
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Thank you so much for messaging me, it means a lot. Alongside everything, our son is in a reduced timetable at school as he is not managing high school, so we get little time to ourselves. When we do we chat and have a hug, we both need it at the moment. I have spoke. To m manager and she is expecting me to be off for at least a week. I heard that my sister is likely to drift away soon, but you never know. I’m just allowing myself to cry, off to my mother in laws funeral in Cornwall tomorrow, so dreading hearing any bad news about my sister whilst being at the funeral supporting the kids and my husband x
I would say take more time if you need it. I took three weeks off in all, made up of various leave types. Sometimes work has to come second, especially if you feel at breaking point. We all have our limits and better to plan for time off than make yourself ill.
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When we arrived back from Cornwall following the funeral, we had a call that night to say my sister had died earlier that day.
I’m feeling very tired, and feeling at a loss about my self as a person as I’ve lost three sisters and I’m only 50. I will be taking extended time off until I can process this.