My Boyfriend and we’re going through a temporary break up when he died on the 5th I feel so lost and guilty like I should have been with him on his last days here and we were taking time apart there were things he needed to work on and me as well we loved escorted so much we were Js seeing life different we both had goals to have children but we needed time to work on other things before we brought someone else into the world and he suddenly died and now I feel lost he was so young he died at 18 he had his whole life ahead of him I Js need help understand why or how I need someone to talk to that understands me I Js feel so guilty like we dint have to separate to fix things and we could have spent that time together and now time is up
@Valerie1 hi Valerie I am so sorry for your loss I lost my partner pauline in April its early days for you so its still very raw I’m sure your boyfriend knew you loved him and feeling lost is normal we all feel lost and empty without our loves keep posting on here you will find support and everyone here understands how we are feeling stay safe take care
Thank you but I Js feel like I was pushing him away scared he’d never change I feel like he didn’t know how much I loved him
@Valerie1 even with you doing that I’m sure he still knew you loved him as you said it was a temporary break we all do we all do the ifs buts maybes and feel guilty for something I think its part of the grief please don’t be hard on yourself you are going through enough pain none of us are perfect and every relationship has its ups and downs
So sorry for your loss.
Please don’t feel your to blame, you didn’t know he was going to die. You both agreed a break in your relationship, you both wanted to think things through and to work on the difficulties you were having which was a mature decision to make.
He knew how much you loved him, hold onto that.
Sending you a hug
Yes but I feel I could have tried harder I felt like he wasn’t changing so I tried to push him away and he begged and begged but I kept pushing him away thinking it was the right thing to do
Thank you I Js hope he knew how much I love him
@Valerie1 but you weren’t to know what was going to happen so please try to stop blaming yourself we never know what life has in store for us and we think we have all the time in the world and then the one we love is taken from us and then we realise just how short life is there were times when I hurt my partner with things I said in anger and I feel bad for that I loved her with all my heart and soul and always will we all have regrets and we all make mistakes try to remember the love you had and what you meant to eachother don’t let guilt eat away at you
I feel like I Js need some clarity some sort of sign that he knows
Thank you so much for your kind words I think I needed this group to help me get through this your wisdom and advice Js giving me some relief
@Valerie1 you are welcome and I hope it is helping you will find support here everyone understands what we are going through sending you strength I am sorry you are going through this heartbreak take one day at a time and be kind to yourself
Thank you so much