My Mum passed away yesterday afternoon. I didn’t get there in time. She has been unwell for a while and was in hospital but I had no idea how close she was to the end. I should have left earlier. My sister is on her way back from Australia and I encouraged her to wait a few more days as she was due to be discharged. She still doesn’t know I don’t know how to cope with the guilt that both of us were not there. I can’t get the image of her body out of my head.
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Hello @Kakafonous,
I’m part of the Online Community team and I can see that you are new to the community - I’d like to thank you for bravely starting this thread and sharing how you are feeling. I’m so sorry to hear about your mum. Most community members have sadly experienced the death of a loved one and so will understand some of what you are going through.
I’m sure someone will be along to offer their support. In the meantime, you may wish to look at these Sue Ryder resources which might be helpful.
- Our Grief Guide self-help platform which has information, resources and advice to help you through your grief
- Our Grief Coach text service, which sends you personalised text support via SMS
- Our free Online Bereavement Counselling which is held via video chat
- Our Bereavement Information pages which can walk you through what you are going through.
You might also want to look at this article: Losing a parent
I really hope you find the community helpful and a good source of support and I also hope you feel you can access more support should you need it.
Thank you again for sharing – please keep reaching out and know that you are not alone.
Take care,
Alex
I am so sorry to hear about your Mum. I think guilt is something we all feel when we lose a parent. I am racked with it. I know it’s easy to say but you didn’t know she was going to die that day and probably most people don’t get to say goodbye I know it doesn’t help. I will never forget that I wasn’t there for my Mum when she died but I couldn’t have known but it doesn’t stop the guilt. There was so much more I wanted to do with my Mum before she died but I thought she had more time.
I can’t get the imagine of my Mum out of my head too. It’s so soon for you - it’s takes to time to come to terms with it. I am 4 months in but sometimes it still doesn’t feel real. Your Mum will have known how much you loved her even though you weren’t there at the end. Sending lots of best wishes xx