I hate myself at the moment, christmas and new year was awful, today got a phone my uncle is.back in hospital.
Keep getting headaches wait8ng to see the doctor about them.
Miss my mum so much
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Sorry for your loss and your struggle. It is always going to be a hard time of year now for me as my Mum loved it soo much. I can’t do anything but feel her loss so deeply. It doesn’t get easier but it does change 
Thanks it hard as it coming up to 2 years that i lost mum
I lost my Mum 17 months ago. I don’t see many posts about loss and it’s continuing effects.
I still feel like I am drifting aimlessly. I miss my Mum soo much still and fill with tears soo often when I feel like I should be more in control of things.
I never had any idea how hard loosing Mum would be 
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Life depressing these days, I lost my mum August 23 and June last year was Diagnosed with Myeloma Cancer. Im still in the flat I shared with mum. I put music on a lot, to make things easier, but they not really!
Same here i stillin the same house that i live with my mum and stepdad most of the day i am on my own, i have tried also sort of things but nothing helps, i jusy feel so.alone and depressed.
I hear you, it’s not easy! I listen to a lot of older music but that takes me back to my childhood and mum as well. You can’t escape it, I had days when I been ok, followed by days the tears come again. Even reading a post on here can get me emotional. It’s horrible!
I had a series of horrid things after Mum died. I still have her house where I cared for her and she died. I had to clear it after 6 months as it cost too much to leave empty. I had to rent it but it was heart breaking to do. I had her beloved dog for 7 months who adored me and came every where with me. He got a cancerous tumour and I had to hold him while he was out to sleep. It sounds crazy but it was like loosing mum all over again!
The house is not far and I still do the garden and spend time in the village. I just haven’t been able to move on. I want to go out and do things and meet people, when I do I find I need to run home to our little cottage to feel quiet again.
I tried to get another job having given mine up to look after Mum, but I just found it too overwhelming.
I just feel like I am in some odd dream state where I might wake up. I don’t feel like the person I was and those around me have all moved on though I know they miss her? I don’t want to go back and she wouldn’t want to come back or be back where we were. It’s all soo confusing!
It’s lovely to see it’s not just me so thank you X
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Hi no it not just you, i know how you feel i am also going through it at the moment. It feels like it never ending, it hard to watch other people.carry on with there life’s.
If you even want to talk i here you can message me
That is really kind. I nurses for 35 yrs and helped look after 2 relatives so they could end their lives at home. I lost my Dad when I was in my 20’s and had 2 young kids so could help.
I feel like I have been making up for at ever since. Looking after Mum was a whole other thing. It just completely took me to my knees physically and mentally.
The process of living with out her when she was such a massive part of my live for so long is just too much. Where do you begin?
She was someone who could be controlling and was terrified to be alone. I pushed her to keep going and was often pushing her away as she was soo needy. I knew I would look after her and at home. I just never had any idea how had it would be and how deeply it would affect me and my life.
I am 60 this year and should be so full of happiness and excitement. She has left me safe financially and we are soo lucky but none of that helps. I love my
Husband and my 3 girls but still feel like no one cares if I am there or not. Mum did. She loved me soo very much, more than I could see when we lived together.
I just wish I had appreciated it all more when she was here, knew we had soo little time left.
I just want my energy, my spark and my get up and go back to make her proud and use the time I now have but I feel so unable! It’s such a bizarre thing to explain or say out loud to anyone else.
That’s for hearing me. It really helps X
Hi
You are more then welcome. I know what you going through. My mum was everything to me, i had trouble last year as i shiulx have been celebrating my 50th. I am like you having trouble no-one understand. I am single and live at home, so now it me and my dad only. My brother and sister does not want to know.
Anytime you want to message me then do, i will always listen