He is with me all the time

After Jack died in October 2018 - I think I was frozen inside
I felt pain, hurt, sorrow loneliness like we all do - there are lots of things I don’t remember . I know I missed him - but I don’t know if I thought about him all the time - I just don’t remember

All I know is that is now he is with me all the time ! I think about him all the time!
I think about him when I carry heavy stuff and he is not here to help, I think about him when I am crying and he can’t console me
He is with me when I go for walks, when I want to share news, when I am alone and when I have company
He is with me when I cook, when I teach, when I step in the new house and when I go to the old one
I constantly think about him
After 27 months I still wished I could bring Jack back - I wished we could relive our lives again and again

He is with me when I regret my moments of impatience, when I regret how I found difficult when he retired ! I regret that I didn’t make more apple pies!!

I constantly think about Jack -
Now I am in our old house - and as I look around I wished I could pack everything and come back - but I also know Jack would say that is better to have moved closer to our daughter!!

I think about him all the time - he is with me all the time and all the time I am so aware that he is not here! He is dead, I died with him and I am alone
I don’t like my life without Jack


My husband passed December the 5th
Last year I think about him every second
Off the day so bloody hard
Sob all the time
Please take care xx

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Oh Sadie and Debbie I do feel for you both. I too think about Mike all the time. I get upset in the kitchen as that was his domain - getting meals. It upsets me to be there. As you say, our loved ones are with us all the time and when they died we died with them. I am just hoping that we will one day find peace in our hearts to remember them with love and happy memories instead of wondering if we did enough. We all do our very best at the time with the resources that we have available so we shouldn’t be too hard on ourselves. We just need to get past regrets and mixed emotions. Just remember that every tear we shed is watering the seeds of our love.
Love and light. x


It’s bloody difficult, isn’t it? The things they used to say, their smiles, and even their sad faces just keep popping up in your mind. The memories have been etched so deeply it’s impossible to put them away even for awhile, it just proves how much we still love them

Sending you a big hug xxx


Hello all
Yes so hard to really do anything
Andy birthday Thursday broke my heart
Ordering flowers for him
Love to you all x