Help me please

I lost my mam on Monday 10 march I feel lonely hurt devastated and angry was in hospital 24 hours and passed away after a stroke and damage to brain and other illness I had mam living with me for 2 weeks after her stroke because she was really poorly, went in to hospital and died 24 hours later I have had a few cries but people can’t understand why I can’t grieve and I don’t understand either feel so bad that I can’t grieve everyone around me had cried Infront of me but I just can’t grieve and this is killing me she was my mam I should be able to grill lived for my mam

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Im so sorry for your loss @Caron36 - i lost my mum 16 months ago after becoming her full time carer the last year of her life.

There is no right way to grieve - please dont let others make you feel like you’re grieving “wrong” and dont feel bad about not crying. It sounds like your Mums death was very sudden, and your mind and body will be in shock. Your brain is trying to process what happened, and its likely that this is its way of protecting you for now :people_hugging: Everyone will react differently because we’re all so unique. Some people will respond with displays of emotion, others will throw themselves into practical tasks. Please be kind to yourself in these early days - try and rest if you can, eat and stay hydrated - look after your body so that it can support you. If you feel the urge to cry, then go with it, but equally dont worry if you dont! Just let your emotions flow however they want to. Sending you hugs and strength :heart::people_hugging::heart:

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@Caron36
I’m so sorry for the loss of your Mum.
You’re in shock, that’s why you feel this way. When people experience real sudden trauma that is the mind’s natural response for a while to protect you. It happens with physical injuries too, people can suffer major injuries and just not feel pain initially. But you will, when your mind is ready to let you. Grief is complex and you’ll experience a range of emotions I expect and probably in waves.

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Really sorry to hear about your Mam and that you’re struggling, @Caron36 . It’s a couple of days since my Mam passed and I’m still feeling pretty overwhelmed with it all, too. One thing I’ve learned on here and from talking to others is that grief is a very personal thing, it can’t be measured by time you spend crying. I hope in time you’ll take some comfort in the fact that you were with her right until the end. Take care.

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I can understand how you feel because when my mum died I did not cry even at her funeral. I realise now 6 months later that it was because I was in shock.
To begin with I kept thinking why am I not crying people will think I don’t care. I have now come to realise that it is more common than I had thought not to cry. For me it was my bodies reaction to complete shock of my mum dying.

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