I am so very lost and lonely. I laid my beautiful husband to rest yesterday, and feel like ive been hit by a sledgehammer.
I know that people will say everything im feeling is normal and its still early days, but i cant cope with just waking up, fighting to just get through the day, knowing that the next day and the next are going to be exactly the same, lonely and empty. I have amazing friends and family, but they arent who i want, i want my husband back and they cant be with me all the time.
I no longer have a purpose, nothing to look forward to and can not see the point. How do you even begin to navigate this horrible new world. I just dont want too anymore.
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Dear @Mrs-S, I am truly sorry you are going through this pain. I’m sure all of us on this forum can completely relate to how you’re feeling, and I wish I could say something that will help, but there are no words.
We somehow get through… I am now over 7 months since losing my husband suddenly and like you, I’ve felt what is the point? I wanted to die with him because I could see absolutely no point in going on. I’ve been lonely, empty, terrified of the future and worried about how I’m going to look after my house and garden, and that’s only mentioning a few of the emotions that have consumed me.
But we keep putting one foot in front of the other. It’s one of the hardest things we’ll ever have to cope with, but you will survive it. I’m not going to lie - I have more bad days than better days - but the days I manage to get even a little housework done, give me a sense of accomplishment and I think that’s what we have to focus on, one hour at a time.
Please hang in there… you are very much not alone in this. Sending you love, and message if you need to chat.
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hello i am so sorry for your loss i to lost my husband 6 months ago after 47 years of marriage and yes it is very hard we are now in this club we hoped we wouldnt be in and every day we keep going because we must we have to let our husbands partners anybody who we have lost that we keep going for them as they didnt get to live as long as they had hoped and i know my husband Davy wouldnt want me to be sad all the time even though it is so hard so everynight i talk to him and tell him about my day even though it must be boring to hear and every robin i see i think davy is watching me so just take your time and do what helps you to survive
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Just the other day, i put a picture of the sunrise on my social media page, saying how i used to dread a new day, the pain of living was too great but now, here i am taking pictures of a sunrise and being grateful. Something i would never have thought possible at the beginning of this journey.
Life is hard, cruel and nothing feels positive for you right now. Days and thoughts are dark. Please hang on in there. This is going to be tough but you will find an inner strength you never knew you had.
Take each day as it comes and break the days into hours. You will get through. You’ve been doing it since day 1. The sun rises and falls, we can’t change it. At the moment you’re being dragged through each day but you will soon stand up and take control again.
Life is hard but you can do it.
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So so sorry for your loss. It’s unbearable.
My life is so different now, nearly 7 months on. I have family but I live 100 miles away from any of them. I am trying to get a balance between doing the necessary things for living, getting out and about by train to visit people (I don’t drive) and spending time alone, grieving (lots of tears) Its not what we expected. My husband was very busy and active. He died suddenly, by my side, early one morning in May. This time last year we were happily getting ready for Christmas together and now, this year, I’m just going to let Christmas pass me by. There seem to be so many of us who are grieving and lonely and struggling to build some kind of new life. We may feel lonely we are not alone. Thinking of all of you others out there, with love.
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