Her Birthday Tomorrow

I lost my wife nearly 10 months ago now and got through Christmas band our wedding anniversary but I’m dreading her birthday tomorrow. I’d buy her lots of presents and give them to her during the day.

Last birthday we went out for a lovely meal and it was the last time she went out as the first lockdown came into force. I still cry every day and miss he so dreadfully, I can survive but life has no purpose now and I so miss her smell and touch, I keep hoping it’s a nightmare and I’ll wake up but it’s not, she was only 62 and I found her dead on the floor, I try and have happy memories but I can’t, I miss her every moment of every day,

1 Like

Dear Chas

I am so sorry for your loss. I cannot imagine how difficult it must have been for you.

I lost my husband in September. Our 39th wedding anniversary is on Saturday and the following month it will be my husband’s birthday. He was 60 when he was involved in a road traffic accident and did not survive. Life ended for me on that day and the nightmare began.

I wish there was something that I could say to take the pain away. I survive for our kids and our beautiful gentle little grandson who takes on greater resemblance to my husband every day. My husband loved us so much and absolutely adored our grandson. We did not need anything else other than being with each other and having our family. I cry for my husband’s loss and for what he has lost.

I will be thinking of you tomorrow.

Take care
Sheila xxx

Thank you Sheila, I’m so sorry for you losing your husband so tragically. We take it for granted we will always have our partners but it can be all taken away in the blink of an eye, it’s hard to enjoy life without our soulmates,

Dear Chas

Thank you. That is exactly as I describe it. We spoke 3 hours before the crash, he was so happy. We had just got back on our feet after each being made redundant four years prior and despite both getting new jobs we lost two thirds of our income, sold the family home and down-sized in the truest sense. Had just got the bungalow exactly the way we wanted it. We used to say that we had ‘future-proofed’ our life for when we were less mobile. Had grand plans for me to retire and go off on a wonderful retirement holiday and enjoying our little grandson.

I wake each day hoping to find it was just a bad dream. Anniversaries, birthdays and other special events make the challenges so much harder.

Take care and again I will be thinking of you tomorrow.


Hello Chas, I also suddenly lost my wife nearly 10 months ago and the last time we were out for a meal together was 14th March last year. You and I met briefly on this site when you kindly reached out to me last June, and I was very grateful.
I can completely understand and empathise with your anguish. Everything you had and loved has disappeared and it’s impossible for your mind to reconcile the consequences. Somebody said to me recently that all loving couples should be taken together. Some wouldn’t agree, especially the children, and of course it would reduce the participants of this site.
You will always miss her but unfortunately we cant turn the clock back, much as we would like to, and we must go forward regardless of how difficult it is to accept the situation.
My darling wife was too young to be taken at 75 because she was much younger in appearance and spirit, but for your wife to be taken at 62 is even worse.
We do all take things for granted when it’s going well, but it’s a hard lesson to learn when its too late. I know tomorrow will not be easy and I hope you manage to get through yet another “first”. Best wishes my friend. Al

Chas hearing your story of your wife’s passing has really moved me. You also found her and the trauma you experienced in finding her I fail to articulate. Life is so very short and none of us know what the future holds. We build our lives with our loved ones hoping to grow old together and George an I did that. He died suddenly of a brain bleed in January 2021. I keep thinking that it is a dream and he’s on holiday somewhere an will come home soon. It is so sad for us all. However let’s do justice to them and keep their memory alive.

1 Like