Hi all
I lost my wife to cancer in 2019. She would’ve been 64 on Thursday. She was my world and I’m losing it. Someone reach out.I’m so lonely, I
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Hi @MartynPG i lost my step mum to cancer in august and my aunt who was like a mum 8 years ago november. I feel there loss everyday
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Thank you. I try and do the things we both loved but it makes it worse.
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Aye i know what you mean. But its good to do those things its your way of keeping her with you… she wouldnt have wanted you to stop doing the things you both enjoyed. My step mum loved christmas. She helped me decorate my christmas tree for the first time in my own home. And i cant bring myself to get excited about it.
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Hi Martynpg
I wish I had the words to comfort you, I’ve just lost my partner 2 weeks ago. I feel like I’m having an out of body experience, I’m waiting to wake up from this nightmare. Please know though you are not alone in this.
Hugs
Sam x
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Thank you Sam.
So sorry for your loss. It’s the silliest things can trigger a ‘moment’
I married my partner of 36 years and she passed away 6 days later. Dec and Jan hold so many anniversaries and memories for me I find it difficult to cope. I’m glad I joined this group though. Please message me anytime. I don’t know how you feel, but I can relate.
Hugs back.
Martyn.
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Hi my friend,so sorry to hear about your late wife to cancer ,I also lost my darling wife Judith to cancer back in 2021 27th September at 2.15pm it was a Monday afternoon.The worst day of my life as you well know Martyn.I am also lost without her but you will find many friends on here as I did back then.We are always here to listen to you . Much love Michael x
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Wow so many of us living with this horrendous nightmare of grief and pain,it never goes away. Lost my dear wife to cancer 27/9/21. Life has fallen apart for me now. Michael x
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This truly a wicked disease,it takes so many people young and old.My wife Judith was 75 but she did not look it as you can see in my profile photo.It tortured her body and soul and left her thin and weak.Chemo and so many drugs could not help her.I was with her when she took her last breath and I should have gone with her. Michael x
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Hi Michael, im so sorry for your loss.I feel like we have all been robbed of our future. My partner passed 25/11/22 to a cardiac arrest. I have the funeral tomorrow, my life feels like its over now, nothing yo look forward to and no plans to make. Nobody to share my day with. The nights are so long and I hate opening my eyes in the mornings.
Sam xx
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Thank you Michael. We did so many things together and the memories of happier times are just so bittersweet. It would of been her 64th birthday on Thursday and all I want is to celebrate with her.
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I wish you peace today.X
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Morning to all my good friends on here today with the prospect of a nationwide nurses strike and the weather getting even more colder and now we all have to make sure we keep well. Now my dear wife was diagnosed with stage 4 bladder cancer during mid 2020,she was informed a major operation was necessary ,in October 2020 I took her to the hospital for the operation which lasted 9 hours ,I was phoned by the surgeon later that day to say that he had removed all the cancer,I was overcome with relief. She had 46 staples holding her body together.She was in ICU for 4 days and a further 7 days back on the ward.A good friend help me with looking after her over the coming weeks.Moving on into 2021 she was told chemotherapy was necessary just to make sure but after another scan the cancer was back in 2 places,more treatment for this poor woman and then the pain became so bad that she was taken back into hospital and she never came home again after that.7 weeks in a cancer ward so many drugs ,limited visiting due to Covid but my MP got me permanent access to her.I was then told by the Doctors that my wife was dying and had only a few weeks left,I was destroyed ,devastated after all she had been through.They arranged a hospice for her but in 4 days she passed away with me by her bedside.I will never forget that moment ever.I now have to live with these terrible memories day and night. God help us all. Much love Michael xx
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Morning Michael
Firstly I would like to say how sorry I am for the loss of your wife. I am very new to this and have never felt anything like this. My heart and world is broken. I’ve always been very strong going through life but this has taken me somewhere else. I am 50 years old and have no future now, my life has been destroyed, and although we all wake each morning and go through the motions of the day, I often feel I’m not in the room. I’m so lonely in a room full of people. And I know family and friends are all grieving the loss of my partner, but they don’t feel what we are feeling, the pain is real and it hurts like nothing I’ve ever felt before. I still don’t believe this is even real, I’m expecting him to walk back through the door.
Waking up each day should be a blessing but right now it just feels like a cruel blow.
Sending peace and love
Sam
Xx
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Hi Martin
Reaching out on this forum is a good step, everyone on here has had such unbearable loss & whilst everyone’s grief is different, we can relate.
It’s so hard isn’t it & the pain doesn’t get easier despite what people say. I lost my husband in 2019 like you did your wife, it was just before Christmas & coming up to the third year anniversary has been really hard. I think as time goes on others think you’ve moved on & it doesn’t hurt anymore. What they don’t realise is, your life has moved on because it has to, there’s no choice in waking every morning & getting through each day, but the pain isn’t any less. The pain of seeing other couples holding hands, doing their Christmas chores, going out together with other couples. My husband was 59 so all our friends are still couples & I am lucky as they still invite me round & we go out but deep inside I feel the pain of Derek not being with me, feel the odd one out, literally you’ve lost your other half.
Keep writing about your feelings, I write a journal when I feel down, getting them out of my head is good therapy for me. Also started writing them in poetry.
I also wrote a journal of all our happy memories together, the silly little things & that helps too. I still add to it when something pops into my head.
Sending love & strength
Take care
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Hello ,yes I feel exactly the same,been a widower now since that awful day 27th September 2021 at 2.15pm when Judith passed away in the hospice from the dreaded cancer.I am hating every minute of this lonely existence.Second Christmas without her ,I will be glad when it is over in more ways than one.I too hate it and get so jealous seeing happy couples hand in hand.My so called family have almost forgotten I exist.This site has been a life saver ,such lovely people all on the same journey . Much love Michael xx
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Hi, I am so incredibly sorry for your loss. I lost my wonderful amazing Dad in August. He had lived with me for the last 9 years and he was a massive part of my life as I cared for him throughout his Terminal Cancer battle. I’m 51 years old and have no partner now or children. I feel so incredibly lonely and it hurts so much. Just trying to make it throughout the day is incredibly difficult. I’ve never felt loneliness like this, but I’m also disabled too which makes getting out and about quite difficult. I know i need to get out there and meet new people etc etc. But who wants to know someone like me who’s just bloody miserable to be honest.
I feel your loneliness 100% . I think let’s get Christmas and New year out of the way and then make a plan moving forward about what I’m going to do next year. Something has to change for me. I don’t know if you feel the same. But I just know, I can’t carry on with life feeling the way I do now.
Being on this site is really helping me though because you always feel that you’re the only one in the world who feels like this. And that no one in the world understands what you’re going through.
But it’s also so sad to see how many people who are really struggling with their grief. I think as long as i read and communicate on this site. It does help me to feel less lonely.
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Hi Martyn
Life is so cruel and you are not alone.
We have all experienced great loss recently
and life is unbearable some days…People tell us it will get easier to bear in time but at the moment, I expect you feel like me and find it hard to believe. I am a positive person so I hope we will all come through this devasting period. We have to carry on so try to remember the good times with your wife.
I did everything with my husband so find even being with friends very hard to accept.
Had plans for the bungalow we had just moved too 2 wks before John died.
We hoped to continue our travel and holidays abroad. All these plans abd hopes together are so painful.
Try to be strong and keep busy
Thinking of you every day
Love xx
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Good afternoon to everyone,I had to come on here this afternoon,I am constant thoughts of Judith my late darling wife and Christmas makes it even worse.I miss seeing her in the kitchen making all the special treats we had at this time of the year.The lovely smells of the food cooking,it makes me very sad and lonely.This my second Christmas without her and it does not get any better my friends does it?Seeing all these happy families out together buying their presents and food.We always had such good times with the family but that has all changed now,we are not as close as I thought we might be,her passing seems to have changed things.I will be on my own for Christmas Eve this year but will have Christmas Day with my Step Daughter and family.We took it all for granted did we not and then it was gone. Much love to you all Michael xx
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