Hiding behind sunglasses

I find my despair and lack of confidence as made me addicted to wearing shades is there any one else like me?I have never been a over confident person but now at a all time low .scared and reclusive.the pain is no better at all for me still can’t believe the loss of my dearest daughter.Annette.

No I dont do that but since he died I tend to stay in a lot and dont want to socialise very much which in fact hiding away from life and people. I hope in time it will ease off.

I can understand this annette, I find I prefer evening walks now to daytime ones. After a bereavement we’re in a sad place, and that makes us feel vulnerable, and somehow more exposed.

Hello Annette, Kris and Jan - I agree with you all. For the first 6months I only went to medical appointments and to the out of town Tesco and even that was accompanied. I felt like a little person in a vast expanse of nothingness, like coming out of an air-raid shelter to find your landscape is now strange and unknown. The world has mainly “shrunk” back to size now but I will only go to the 24 hour shops when it’s dark when I have the choice, I avoid walking along the main road into town. It’s like “imaginary” sunglasses for me I would say. Yes, it’s isolating myself and hiding away but even now some 14 months after losing my Husband I don’t feel “upto” engaging in what was once a basic part of everyday life. It’s hard, take care everyone.

To all of you that kindly replied to me thankyou.Xmas is approaching and it makes people like us feel even more sad that our precious darlings that we have lost are no more my heart is smashed to a pulp.and I know and realize you and all of us here on this site feel likewise.all my best to each and every one of you.I myself wish I was comatosed till the axmas shindig of it all was past.all my best Annette.xxx

Hello Annette, I totally understand. I used to be the most outgoing and confident person you could meet. I could go anywhere and be just fine but when my husband died three years ago, all my confidence vanished. I stayed in, told our sons I wasn’t feeling well and I had a bad cold and made excuses not to go out with them. When I had to go to the hospital for a check up or to my GP’s for a check up I got a taxi there and back. This went on for three years, I could not facing getting the bus. I went out with our sons and grandchildren but my confidence had gone. Even to this day I still prefer my own company, I feel as if, when I lost Peter, I also lost myself. Sheila xx

I totally agree. It’s approaching the 3rd Christmas and it’s still just as difficult to face. I’m trying not to think about it at the moment which helps put off the dread of Christmas Eve and News Years Eve which I find so distressing. I feel that pain now while I’m writing this. It’s going to happen and we’ll get through it, feeling nothing, just numbness, putting on a face for others as I feel that I will be hurting them if I’m upset and miserable. Being with family helps us to get through and it’s difficult for them too so I’ll wear the mask.
As far as socialising goes, none of it feels the same. It’s not disappointing as I don’t want to do much just meeting a few friends quietly is enough and it provides a distraction fo a little while which is good.
Thinking of everyone whose struggling.
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