One of the dictionary definitions of hope is…
“The longing or desire for something accompanied by the belief in the possibility of its occurrence”
Perhaps I should begin by saying that anyone newly bereaved, and by that I mean however long it takes, will find hope difficult. I gave up on hope at first. It can be fleeting and elusive. But I came to realise that without it we are lost. The future looks so bleak in the beginning. What we have lost can never be replaced in this life. But, to me, hope is the knowledge and understanding that all is not lost or ever can be. One of the things that has given me hope, is the understanding that my wife would not want me to be without hope or miserable. When in the midst of grief hope can seem impossible. We need time to adjust and take stock. This may be years after our loss. This is a big ask when in the pits as so many of us are. Everyone has hope just as everyone has courage. It’s always there but so often unrealised. No one can make you hope. They can be kind understanding and encouraging, but in the end it’s down to us as individuals. ‘Hope springs eternal in the human breast’. It does, but the more we give up on hope the longer it takes to emerge from the pain.
Best wishes and love and Blessings to all. John.


Oh John
So lovely. As I come through this mist caused grief I have often over the past year stood somewhere peaceful and asked for HOPE. I am not quite sure what I was expecting or if I even have that Hope I have asked for so often but I do know that somewhere deep inside me I felt the need to have it. Is it going to change my life if I do receive it? is it going to make things easier? But I do feel that somehow I have to hang onto having Hope as without it there is nothing.
Pat xxx

So right John,
, Hope is what we all need, when in such deep grief it is almost impossible to think we will have hope anymore. Life has changed beyond belief. But without hope we can’t go on. Whatever time it takes it will become a little easier, maybe acceptance, , then hope.
Life does, as we are often told, goes on, But… it’s not the same, it’s very different, , I know my darling husband, worried about me coping, and being alone, he wanted me to have a life , and I’m trying, , I hate being me , I loved being a couple. I Hope, one day I will feel happy again and have hope for the future. Right now that’s not easy, but it will come

Bless you