How can something curable be missed by doctor's

After going on cancer sites I found out that the condition my wife had was curable if doctors had done the correct checks for the symptoms she had. Instead she was full diagnosed and given hours if that left. Taken ages to write this as painful and eyes keep going. How do I ever trust my GP. Cancer research suggests the time span after diagnosis is about 20. Years Not the hours we were given. She was only 53

Hi JayandAlison
Like you I have spent constant hours on google researching info about the condition my husband developed suddenly. I am angry, confused, searching for answers and I suppose looking for someone or something to blame. You are not alone xx

jay, yes I know all about Goggling and my husbands consultant told me not to do it, ok that’s what she said but it was to late I had already done a full job which told me all I needed to know, so I thought. It didn’t help because each person is different and it forgot that we go when it’s our time. The search said 18 - 24 months but what happened was 7 weeks which it didn’t say. Please think, it’s when our time is up not what a consultant or Goggle search says. As they say ‘God moves in mysterious ways’. I do hope this helps because no matter what we do we can’t bring them back. It’s not our choice. That’s what I have had to learn but it takes time to come to terms with our loss. Take care. S

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My mum died two days after her cancer diagnosis. For months the drs told her she has a broken rib. Actually she had metastasised cancer. They are not even sure where it started as she was too ill to have further investigation. It still shocks me after 10 months the way she died. So quick. Maybe a blessing I guess

so your[consultant ]doctor said dont google hey.well googling gets the real facts to much crap given by many doctors.and the corners they cut to save money for the nhs.please dont tell us its not worth looking.and if you’ve been lucky 1 in a million whose had great service from your consultants [doctors] and the nhs whoopie doodle.

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Ooh, you’re up late Ian. I don’t go the the GP very often but the last time I was there she actually googled something herself. I think it can be very helpful but it can also be frightening. I think we have to be careful. x

hi Kate agree to some extent ,but im responding to suzie and my experiences are that doctors cancer consultants only scan breasts and they know that seconary breast cancer can come any where in the body.yet nothing is done to change procedure and scan the whole body to put the patients minds at rest and enhance the chances of catching the signs earlier.im fuming because I know my baby Jayne was treated like crap like lots of ladies who ended up getting secondary breast cancer and passing because of the corners cut by the consultants and the nhs.

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I’m sorry Ian. It sounds like a pretty awful experience and one I couldn’t possibly comment on. Fortunately, I haven’t been in that situation. It’s something extra to deal with on top of your grief. I’m sad for you and for your beautiful Jayne. x

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thank you very much Kate.
its just so damn sad that they put saving money before helping cancer patients by giving a full body scan,and I hate the response well not evey one would benefit.wtf .we would of paid and im sure others put the health and safety of their loved ones before bloody money,excuse my French

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Your French is excused Ian :wink:. Go ahead and swear away, if it helps. If I could wave a magic wand and bring your lovely lady back to you then I would. That’s after I’ve brought my David back, of course :smiling_face_with_three_hearts:

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Dear Jay, I am so sorry that you have lost your dearly loved wife at such a young age.I can understand why you feel so aggrieved by her treatment in addition to the profound grief you feel from her premature death. Unfortunately, that feeling of being let down only adds to the pain of grief and makes it unbearable at times.
My husband died suddenly last November aged 64. An apparently strong and fit man, he died on an evening out with our 27 year old son mid conversation with no warning whatsoever.
Unbelievably that was deemed not sudden enough to warrant a post mortem by the coroner who accepted the cause of death diagnosed by the a&e doctor even though no attempt was made to access my husbands medical records. He was in a different city when he died and thus a different health authority.
What followed was a catalogue of arrogance and errors that has caused untold hurt to our sons and myself and has without doubt complicated our grieving process. From the word go at the hospital we felt we were not listened to and that my husband was treated as another middle aged man who had collapsed on a night out with no interest in him as an individual whatsoever. Basically these things happen get over it. It really was as blunt as that.
The problem with that attitude is that they had got it wrong. We decided not to accept the coroner’s decision to refuse a post mortem which turned out to be the correct decision as far as my sons are concerned. We begged, literally, for a hospital post mortem which proved that my husband had not died as diagnosed but from a congenital heart condition for which my sons need screening.
This is a condition which is not routinely screened for but if found can be monitored and treated successfully . However it’s a case of if we don’t look we won’t find and this is an attitude which should change across the health service.
I live every day with the knowledge that nothing will bring my husband back but I will not accept that nothing can be learned from his premature death. On paper he is nothing more than a one dimensional statistic in contrast to the multi dimensional husband and father who was the centre of our lives.
Unbelievably eight months on we are still waiting for an acknowledgement that mistakes were made. I have long ago accepted that an apology is unlikely to be forthcoming as that requires a level of humility that is rare within certain sectors of the health service. what I will not accept however and will continue to argue for is that lessons that can be learned should be learned.
Losing the love of one’s life is agony enough but add apparent incompetence into the equation then that agony is intensified to unbearable proportions. I am aware also that some people, not just medical professionals but friends also see my pursuit of knowledge as vindictive as what purpose does it serve.
My answer to that is that it’s like grief itself. Until it’s experienced noone knows what it feels like. I know things can be learned from my family’s devastating experience and to waste that knowledge is disrespectful and in my view in direct contradiction to what health services should aim to be. The cost of preventive care is always going to be worth more than reactive care.
Just as reaction to grief is unique to each and every one of us on this forum so are the circumstances surrounding that grief. Do what is right for you and if you need more answers then pursue them. If you decide not to then that is also ok. It’s an innately personal decision.
Sadly the only thing any of us want is our loved ones back at the centre of our existence. If only…
Keep posting on this site and other people will respond. It does help to realise that however lonely we feel we’re not alone.
Take care

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