How do I support family members?

I lost my son. We had to get the police to break into his house and he had been dead a week. I am broken, the coroners report was like a horror story, my dreams have my son, not as the lovely handsome man he was but as his body after a week. I cry daily, many times each day, I dont sleep but…my daughter is angry with me for not supporting her. She wont come to see me but yells at me on the phone that she “needs emotional support!.” I cant support her and I feel guilt about that and guilt that I couldnt protect my son.
My daughter lives half an hour away and yet only saw her brother 3 times in the last 2 years, She wouldnt see him on his birthday or at Christmas. He told me he didnt think she liked him, he wasnt “good enough” for her. I hope she is feeling guilty at that because it would be better than what seems to be happening, It seems to me she is making his death about her.
Am I guilty of neglecting her and making it all about me? I dont think so but I have no emotional resources to comfort her and now she wont communicate with me at all.

First of all I’m sorry for the lost of your son. I lost my daughter a year ago, she was 25. I have enormous guilt. I cry every day, I feel on my opinion you need to grief for yourself. Your daughter comes across as spoilt, Angry and indeed selfish.
I’m thinking of you and your in my prayers xxx

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Thank you for your kindness. I hope one day we can both stop crying. I wont ever stop hurting but one day the tears will come less readily, I hope x

Hi @abl
I am so sorry for the loss of your son, how horrific to go through something so traumatic. I lost my mum suddenly and unexpectedly and we too found her dead at home. I know its not the same as loosing a child but the shock and trauma is overwhelming. For now you wont be able to do anything other than get through the day. I also think your daughter is being incredibly selfish, she should be supporting you. Please take care of yourself and dont feel guilty that you have nothing to give your daughter at this time, its totally understandable

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