My beautiful ten year old daughter died 15 weeks ago and the pain is unbearable. Everyone talks about time but nothing seems to make it easier. I want some hope, I want to feel normal, I want to be happy but how on earth can I ever feel okay again without her?
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I’m so sorry for your loss. My daughter died 3 years ago and it is overwhelmingly painful. It’s very early days for you and the awful sense of loss and being unable to cope is ‘normal’. That doesn’t make it any easier to cope tho. When people who have lost their child talk about time helping, for me it meant that you start to learn to live with it, not that you get over it. Sometimes people who have no experience of losing their own child suggest that you get over it in time, they are usually basing that on losing a parent or a partner. Both terrible losses but losing a child, or adult, you brought into the world is a different thing and many just don’t understand. You have come to the right place here and you will find other parents who are experiencing that same loss on this website. You are experiencing the worst loss any parent can. You don’t have to get over it but you can learn how to live with it. Honestly. Right now tho you must be feeling just broken. I certainly did. For now it’s good enough to just keeping on keeping on. Don’t expect too much of yourself, you are entitled to grieve and that’s ongoing and there’s no time limit. Just get by, as best you can, day by day and moment by moment. You don’t have to follow anybody’s timetable. Everybody’s different and every one has to find there own way but talking on here to others can help a bit. It helped me. The other thing that helped was contacting Compassionate Friends, they support people like you and me and they are all parents who lost one, or more, children. Through them I’ve met other parents and we support each other and made me realise I’m not totally alone and others have survived this and there is a life going ahead. Meantime it’s very early days for you and the crushingly painful feelings are likely in full flow. Just deal with today and get through that. I know it sounds pathetic but be kind to yourself if you can. It’s a tragedy beyond words and there is no quick fix. You can survive and definately feel better than you do right now. Get all the help you can, particularly from mums and dads who lost a child too. I didn’t know anyone in my situation before I joined Compassionate Friends and this web site. Now I know many people who ‘get it’. It’s some comfort that I’m not totally alone and nor are you. I wish I could say you ‘get over it’. I haven’t, but I have learned to do all the day to day stuff we all have to do and I am learning to ‘live with it’. I hope there’s something in here that you find a bit helpful. I send you all the kindest thoughts and remember you have every right to grieve in whatever way you can. The first months are just bloody awful, filled with all sorts of unknown emotions and fear. You are doing the right thing to reach out for help and you will get good and honest support on here. One day at a time is good enough. Xxxx
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I am so terribly sorry. for a loss like this, I think counseling or groups designed for this loss is important for you.
someone specializing in this loss. it must like being on an island. and you probably cannot relate to others who have not experienced the loss of a beloved child.
you require, I imagine, a special kind of comfort and support and should seek it otherwise isolation will not be helpful. such a terrible event will take lots of time and patience and self-comfort, with the support of specially selected others. 
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Hi all I can say is my heart fly’s for you.i lost my beautiful boy 2years ago and it feels like yesterday,it’s a long process going for counseling but one I suggest you take, when you are ready,no words can console the loss of a loved one let alone your baby,I hope you can have a good Christmas, don’t be ashamed of the tears,I cry every day,look for that 
,prayers to u and yours all the best
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Hello so you lost your beautiful ten year old daughter 15 weeks ago and your pain is unbearable some people keeps talks about it and but nothing will make it easier so you would like to be feeling normal and you want to be happy yes and how. Can you be on earth just you will never feel okay again without her just take one day at a time and so think of some special things you had together and it’s Christmas so will bit hard for you
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