How do you reply if someone asks ‘do you have a sibling?’

Losing a sibling
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My 25 year old brother did a few years ago. Every now and again at work or in social settings someone pops the question “do you have any siblings” and I don’t know how to reply. Last time I said “I did have a brother but he died”. But if feels wrong to say “did” because he hasn’t stopped being my brother because he died. And secondly, I hate making the person feel uncomfortable when I drop the “dead” bomb. Has anyone found a good way of answering this question to an acquaintance?

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Hello @Natalie10,

I’m so sorry to hear that your brother died at just 25, that is so hard. Thank you for starting this thread and for reaching out on here. I’m just giving this a gentle, “bump” for you - hopefully someone will have some thoughts to share :blue_heart:

Take good care,
Megan

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Yes, I have a brother, he is in Heaven now.

All you need to say.

Much love.

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So sorry for your loss Natalie10, Your sibling will always be your sibling, death can not change that. You might say, I have a brother who is no longer physically with me. For me, I began a new job a couple years after the loss of my beloved younger sister. I felt anonymous there, because unlike the previous job no one was aware of my sister’s illness and death. Now when coworkers inquire if I have siblings, I say yes, I have 2 sisters (I do have a living older sister) This helps me to keep my younger sibling’s memory alive. Fantasy perhaps, but to me she is not permanently gone, and until we meet again, she is very much alive in my memory and heart. She did not die on every level. It is my way of coping and no one at work needs to know anything more. Xxx

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Hello, thank you very much for your message. I relate to a lot of what you have said and I appreciate your advice and kind words. I’m sorry for your loss also. Sending love xx

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Hello Natalie

I dont think theres an easy answer. Hairdresser asked me and i replied the same way as you. It was the first time ive had to say it in 4 years. Its nice that the person is interested enough to ask and i guess we are lucky that we had a brother.

Kind regards

Sue

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