How do you know when you’re letting it out to the right person? Over the years it seems my husband made good friends mostly work related and my world revolved around him. I know now I have no friends I see out of work, I work remotely and have for nearly ten years, it’s a stark realisation. I hope to remedy that by becoming more outgoing when the time is right but it’s very lonely now. I’m close to my daughter but I can’t offload everything on her, she has to work and look after two kids plus her fella. I know she took her dad’s passing hard and I don’t want to add to her load, she’s doing more than enough for me with preparing for selling the house and being here when she can. Getting the car fixed and that will help when I can get about although that’s scary too when he used to do all the driving.
The only thing I can suggest in response to your question @Vjs is to use this community. It has been a lifeline for me, being able to offload to people who understand how hard and awful it is to have suffered the death of our loved ones.
Like you, I haven’t wanted to burden my friends and family members by telling them how desperately sad I feel. They do care, and would listen, but I feel like a stuck record, and I just don’t think they can understand if they haven’t been through it, or are going through it, themselves. By contrast, this community does understand. We have our own experiences and they differ in many ways but we are all grieving and can support one another.
Having looked round the site some more I can see how it helps so many people, long may it continue to do so.
counseling and grief support groups, in real life if you can.
counseling was very helpful to me.