How much more can i take

Ive only just discovered this site and it helps me when i look at the kind messages and advice lovely people can give and to realise your not alone when at times you feel so isolated i put that title up because 8 years ago my sister and my neice were murdered by her abusive partner i was helped by my wonderful dad who was nearly 80 at the time and my wonderful husband but now ive lost the two strongest men in my life in a matter of months so i need as much help and advice that all you strong and supportive people can give me


Dear @Debrat

This site is amazing for support as we have all experienced the sadness of losing loved ones and understand the pain that goes with it.

The following resources by Sue Ryder may be of help to you at this time especially the Grief Coach.

I really hope you find the community to be of continued support, you are not alone. Take good care of yourself.


@Debrat I’m sorry to hear of your losses, I can’t believe how dreadful it must’ve been to have lost your family in such dreadful circumstances and now to have lost your father and husband. You must feel so alone. You will find much support on here at all times of the day and night. Reach out as often as you need to. :heart::heart:

Thankyou for your kind words I’m glad i found this site and by talking to people who are going through the same might help a bit

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I am glad I found it to , 6 weeks of thinking I was the only one I knew to lose their husband to a sudden heart attack in their 60’s , and yes 3 months before my ex husband died found dead in his flat my sons father , as I said before this was a massive relief as he was a abusive wife beater and it was me on the end of his fist ! My mother in law died in August 2023 my hubby was devastated and I had to organise the funeral , and like I also mentioned my Evertonian cousin died 9 days after my husband I even had a sympathy card from Him for my husband then 9 days later I am sending one to my auntie and uncle for their son but with out my husbands name on it ! So yes I felt like I needed to talk as well to someone who has been through what I have

Im a “debra” too btw - sorry for your losses xx

At times you feel like your the only one hurting i put my 3 daughters through a worrying 4 days over bank hol by telling them i needed to be left alone and for them not to text me but all i achieved was them being so worried and upset and me just crying and being so lonely think that was the worst i ever felt even when it first happened whether I’ve just been in total shock and reality kicked in over weekend but its made me realise not to push people away and try not to say no as a gut reaction i know some people haven’t got anyone I’m lucky i have one thing helped me a bit was watching after life some of the scenes you really can relate too its a bit rude and it did make me laugh at times which we all need anyway I’m going to get my nails done later and might even go for a swim everyone just take care and get through another day and be here for each other

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I returned to swimming on Saturday havn’t swam since 13th April the day Nick had heart attack, apart from a woman hugging me in the pool and nearly drowning me, it was great to get back swimming, especially as the outdoor pool is now open and the sky was blue ,