I too listen to my mums funeral songs. I understand what you say. Her funeral was Tuesday and I listened to them before too. Probably no one else would get this but I felt I needed to prepare myself for the day too and hear every word incase I missed anything on the day. My son also sang to her too. I recorded him whilst he was practicing too before her day. So I listen to him too.
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That sounds lovely re-your son. I find the song of great comfort. Like you I listened and listened before the day so I got all the little bits into my head. I was almost the only one that did not cry when it finished as I was so in the zone.
Take care.
Yes me too. I wanted to be in the zone as I’d written a speech and I needed to get through it so she had the best day I could give her. I wanted it to be about her and joy. If that makes sense x
Hi just wondering how everyone is doing as I see this post if from April and wanted to see if anyone felt any different and hopefully in a better place and any advice on what helped you to get there? I’m currently quite against the idea of Counselling and anti depressants as I haven’t really been able to talk about Mum dying as it’s too difficult and I don’t want to get too upset as I’ve not been back to work that long and work is the only thing I have really found helps as it’s a distraction, well work and spending time out with family and friends. This is the first message I’ve posted as thought I’d see what advice anyone has before start thinking about what to do that might help. I lost Mum suddenly to a undiagnosed heart problem 7 months ago and just found her dead on the floor one morning in the house so now it’s just me living here and I’m still finding it tough if not worse now than at the beginning so thought I’d look on here to get advice from people with similar experiences. Worst thing is I didn’t get to say bye and my last words were swearing and telling her to be quiet the night before as unlike me normally I was in a particularly tired bad mood that day and then I didn’t go in for hours on the morning as she didn’t sleep well generally and I just left her as assumed she was asleep as it was so quiet but the paramedics think Mum was dead roughly about 9 hours before I found her which I feel really guilty about as it I had checked on her sooner then I might have been able to resuscitate. I usually did check on her when she wasn’t feeling well which was the case this time as she had a sickness bug which she tended to get a lot but I was just too tired and grumpy and very unsympathetic on this night which really isn’t like me. I didn’t even here her collapse on the floor in the night but I was sleeping downstairs as was trying to get sleep as all I could here when tried to sleep upstairs was Mum being sick and sort of groening and that. So now I feel like quiet a rubbish daughter for that night and I can never take back my words. I’m just not sure how to deal with grief. I mean I’ve looked online but thought I would see what people on here are saying and I’ll read some more messages that have been posted. Also I’m pretty sure Mum made a comment a few days before she died about having her chest on her left side but I didn’t say anything I don’t think or get her to go to the doctors as Mum often suffered from general pains as had fibromyalgia and asthma and wheezed a lot at night anyway and used to get quite a few chest infections so I didn’t think much of it unfortunately especially as when she has had pains before they have said asthma or chest infection or muscle spasms and as it was just a quick comment as we were sat together watching Tv and then she seemed fine neither of us did anything. I know realise looking back at her symptoms of breathlessness and wheezing and getting tingling and some other symptoms that these are symptoms to do with heart failure but because she had other health conditions we were always told it was to do with them and Mum’s chest only got listened too maybe a few weeks or more before she died and she had an ecg which was ok 9 years before. I’ve ended up typing quite a lot but yeah thought I’d explain but yeah just after advice really.
Oh just noticed it is 2018 too
Oh just noticed it is 2018 too
Hi Bex
I agree with you and wonder how people feel now as it’s hard to imagine how you will feel in the future and hearing peoples real life experience is some comfort x