Husband died 2 weeks ago

Coping ok during the day but the nights are so hard. I curl up on the sofa when I am exhausted because I can’t face the bed we shared

I so understand where you are coming from, I lost my partner of 38 years on Wednesday. I am sleeping on the floor where his hospital bed was, I had to move the sofa to make room for the bed, now I have an empty lounge. I cannot bear to go upstairs so I curl up on the floor with my three cats, leaving the gas fire, tv and light on. I just miss having someone else in the house so much! We did not have children so for the first time in my life I am on my own, I am 55 and cannot imagine my life without him…

Stay strong. Try to eat…you won’t want to, drink some water, it will help. Try to sleep. Be gentle with yourself. I hope in time you can try to return to your bed. I know it seems impossibly hard. Sending you love x

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I lost my husband nearly 3 weeks ago and I can’t believe how much my life has changed.I never thought I could feel this lonely and wretched.I slept in our bed,hardly sleeping,so I got a new,smaller bed so it became my bed,not our bed.I leave the hall light on.I can’t bear the darkness.I do sleep better but I usually wake up around 5am.I do have 2 kids but they’re not Robs kids and they live too far away but they phone and send messages.They have their own lives.We didn’t have friends.We didn’t need anyone else,just each other.As far as I’m concerned,Christmas is cancelled.No tree,no decorations.I just want to get into January in one piece! Jill x

Like I said, do what you feel you need to do. If Christmas is too much, that’s ok. I am 8 weeks in. I’m doing a light touch Christmas. I’ve bought some small token gifts for people. I’ve always found the best part of Christmas was giving to others. The tree is not going up this year though, and I’m going away on the 27th to escape. Take care and take every day at a time. At 8 weeks ( seems like a lifetime) I am starting to feel a bit more grounded.


If its any comfort at all, I read your posts and think you are doing brilliantly just 3 weeks down the line. At that point everything is just a blur for me and I couldnt even communicate on this forum, I was barely looking after myself.
Cheryl x

I think because I was Robs full time carer for 14 years(he was disabled)I had to do everything for both of us.It doesn’t take away the loneliness but I can manage.I have my weepy days,here and there but that’s normal.I try and enjoy the good days! Jill x

Hi, I know exactly how you feel. My husband died 6 months ago and I can hardly sleep in our bed either, I spend most nights on the sofa. I hope it gets better after time but I just don’t know if it does. We were together for twenty four years and I just feel so lonely now. I am lucky that I have children and grandchildren not too far away and they keep in touch a lot and visit but it is still lonely at home most of the time.