Husband terminally ill

My husband is terminally ill, he has pancreatic cancer. He’s gradually declining. He has no energy. Hes on chemotherapy, which he has once a week for 3 weeks, with 4th week off. I’m so stressed out with the situation, I’m so worried all the time. He used to be on a trial, but was taken off as cancer was growing, when on trial he saw a dictor once a week, now hes on normal chemotherapy, he never sees a doctor. He had CT scan roughly 4 wèeks ago, and hasn’t seen a doctor to discuss results. Hes got a continuous cough all the time, he’s had it months. I requested a home visit but got a telephone call instead.


Hello, a very difficult time for both of you, I feel for you both, could you contact McMillan nurses & ask if they can visit & help or Marie Curie nurses or contact your GP Practice & ask for a palliative nurse to be assigned to you? I found when I felt like I was hitting a brick wall I’d contact our palliative nurse & they would find out things on our behalf.


Hi, thanks for replying and for the good advice. My husband has a palliative nurse. I will definitely get in contact with Macmillan nurses to see if they can visit. Today has especially been a bad day, hes getting very forgetful, and in quite a bit of pain.

Hi Nori, thanks for replying. Sorry to hear your husband has terminal cancer too. Theres one more chemotherapy my husband can try, but thats it. Yes its a very stressful time. Yes i have 24 hour chemotherapy line telephone number. No appointment at all for CT results. Will ask tomorrow as my husband has a hospital appointment for bloods and picc line care.

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Hi Nori, well my husband had district nurse around today and his medication is getting reviewed. He is on 60mg slow release morphine twice a day and can top up with oramorph, but i really dont know how many times a day he can top up, he might be having too much? Its such a worrym he also takrs paracetamol every 4 hours.

Hi Nori,

GP rang me on Monday morning, as I had to call Rapid Response on Sunday as I was so concerned about Mike and his pain.

GP have increased his slow release morphine, and he can top up in between with liquid morphine and paracetamol.

I had to call an ambulance on Monday as he was in so much pain, he got checked out thoroughly at hospital, which I was so happy about. He was put on IV drip for dehydration, which really helped. He seems not too bad now, with the increase in morphine.

We have no equipment, we are waiting for handrails to be fitted on stairs and in bathroom. No bed, just his usual bed, he seems to cope with normal bed for now.

Thanks again Nori for being there for me. I really appreciate all your advice.

Mary xx

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@mary6549 Please make use of the Macmillan nurses. We had a Sue Ryder nurse come to see us regularly, and she was always just a phone call or text message away. She even came to my husband’s funeral. The help they can offer is invaluable!


My wife recently passed away after 4 years battling MSA (initially diagnosed as Parkinson’s but changed to MSA as her illness progressed ) - we had a wonderful Sue Ryder nurse and an amazing MacMillan nurse and palliative care specialist.

I concentrated on caring for her which wasn’t easy even with adult social care visits per day towards her last few months.

Both my wife and I felt that the bereavement process started with her MSA diagnosis and she did receive 1:1 support / counselling.

Ask for help, take whatever is available!

I do hope that you have a supportive network of friends and family to help

Hi @Cat_fan

Thank you so much for sharing your experience with the community. We are very proud to have been able to care for your wife and are here with other support whenever you may need us.

Take good care,

Sue Ryder Online Community team


There is also palliative care team of nurses who had been a godsend to me and my husband

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My husband passed away Monday 27 November, absolutely devastated, but he’s no longer suffering. I can’t thank Palliative Care, District Nurses, Rapid Response, Carers enough, they were so caring to my husband.


So sorry …. I find my solace in knowing that my wife is no longer in pain or turmoil !


Thanks Nori x