I lost my son of 41 years a year past February and it doesn’t get any easier. I just feel that I done want to be here and just existing. I have a husband and another younger son of 30 and grandchildren and they say that they need me but I believe they will be able to cope without me on their own. I just feel that my sons death was a waste of a life and why was he put on this earth. Why was he taken from me at such an early age? A mother is supposed to protect their siblings but I have failed in that. I just feel so sad and hurt that he is not here. How does people keep there faith when god takes family before their time?
I feel your pain
I lost my Daughter age 6 months 21 years ago and I feel so angry that she never got to experience life .
Thank you for your kind words. It’s just so hard sometimes.but I will just have to learn to live with it and think of all the good memories we made.
Sylvia
I do truly know what it feels like. My son who was only 36 years, died in August last year.
No it doesn’t seem to get any easier, does it?
How can it when, as a mother, we feel that a part of us is missing? Nothing can replace our loss. No one can ever fully understand the impact of the loss we have to bear.
I relive Andrew’s last few days over and over and over again as if, by doing it, I can somehow change the outcome.
You say your family could cope without you, but are you willing to deny them your part in their lives? Would that make a difference to your loss?
I understand only too well the feeling of a waste of life. I think all bereaved patrents feel this. Sometimes we have to reflect on the life lived and celebrate whatever your son achieved, even the little day to day things because, those memories are all we have and those are the things that keep us going when things seem unmanageable, and at least we have them.
Try sharing those special memories with other family members, and allow them to help you, but remember, they, in their own way, are grieving too and supporting each other can make a huge difference.
How do people keep their faith? That is a big question.
We accuse God of taking, before we are ready, what we feel was ours. Andrew once said to me “I was God’s first and am only on loan to you”. I fought against this for a while, believing I was not a good enough Mum, but I know he was so right. We are God’s masterpieces, we never own another person but have an amazing privilege in being part of someone’s life .
I hope this has helped at least a little and you can feel privileged to have other families members who want you in their lives. Take one precious day at a time. There will be difficult days, but there can be better days if you allow them to happen too.
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You put that beautifully.
God picked you to be Andrews mum and your other children’s too.
Be proud.
G. X
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Thank you Grandma for your amazing encouragement.
You say so much in just a few simple words and I do appreciate that. x
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Thank you for your very kind words. Beautifully said and I take some comfort along with me.