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Grandad has terminal cancer and he is essentially my dad. I haven’t lost him yet but it feels like I’m grieving him already and I’m dreading when he’s gone for good. He is my rock and there are so many memories I cherish and seeing him struggle and be in pain is awful and I know it’s only going to get worse. I don’t know how to process any of it.

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Hi sorry you are going through this. This forum is a great support and it really helps when you just need to vent. I lost my Dad to cancer and can sympathise how upsetting it is. You feel like you are on a rollercoaster that you really dont want to be on. Its painful seeing your loved one deteriorate, you feel helpless, sad and angry. I spent the last two months of my Dads life by his side. We spoke about everything from childhood memories, holidays, listened to music and I also read him a Dad poem that I read at his funeral. We said everything that we needed to say, and I was with him right to the end. Its emotionally exhausting, but I wouldn’t have done it any other way. Its the hardest thing to go through, but you can share some very special moments that you will hold on to for a lifetime.

You need to take care of yourself too, its a really hard road to walk. Take every day as it comes, but be positive about happy memories that you have shared.

Im so sorry that you are going through this. Its heartbreaking, but you will get through it.

I lost my Dad 8 years ago to cancer and was lucky to say everything that we needed to say. Unfortunately my Mum passed away suddenly 4 weeks ago from a haemorrhage and we didnt really get a chance to say goodbye properly as she was put into a induced coma. We were still with her, talking to her, but I would have loved to have said goodbye properly. Its heartbreaking dealing with the aftershock and all the emotions with trying to process it. I think with Dad I had time to mentally prepare myself and it helped, but realistically you will be very up and down, and emotionally exhausted. Spend as much time with him as you can.

Sending love and hugs,

Xxxx

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So sorry to hear this. My husband has terminal cancer (he’s 43 and we have two young kids) and I totally understand that grieving process as soon as you find out. In the early days of finding out I was numb as my whole future has been ripped apart. The way I lm getting through it is not to overthink it, I’m taking each day at a time and literally just putting one foot in front of the other. Minute by minute, hour by hour, day by day. Xx

My Grandma has cancer too. She has also not yet passed but she wont be around much longer. I feel as though she is already gone. Whenever I visit her she is either asleep, really quiete or confused. Its really hard seeing her like that. I have great sympathy for you and your situation and it is comforting to know that I’m not alone