I am so lost

My beloved husband died suddenly and unexpectedly. On this day six weeks ago we celebrated his 67 birthday. The next morning he was gone.
I cannot begin to understand what has happened. All I know is that I am gripped by a pain and sadness and loss that I cannot describe.


Welcome but I’m so sorry for the sudden loss of your husband.
I am sure you will still be in shock and
can’ t begin to believe what has happened.
My partner died suddenly from an aneurysm and to this day I can’t believe what has happened.
All I can say is go slowly , do things in your own time, people want to help but often don’t know what to say or do. If you want to lie on the sofa and cry do so.
I went to a counsellor and at first it helped just to talk to someone but I don’t think he really understood how I felt, if you think counselling will help chose someone experienced with fried.
Wishing you well at this saddest of times ,

Hi theres not a person here that doesnt or hasnt at some point felt your pain. Its a physical and emotional rollercoaster that seems to have a loop to loop and occasionally allows a stop. This ride doesnt seem to have an ending. Wish i hadnt bought the ticket.
But such is life.
One day hopefully

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@Seasurge2 I am so so sorry and all I can say is that I feel exactly the same. It’s so shocking that our darlings can be snatched away from us in an instant. All our hopes and dreams gone. You will find many of us on here to talk to. :butterfly::broken_heart:

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My husband also died suddenly - just three weeks ago. Here one minutes, gone the next. We had been married 50 years but had no children. I have no family save for a brother in Singapore. I am left to care for five elderly dogs, and am now haunted by the fear of losing them, one by one - which, I know, is inevitable. For the moment I am just plodding on, mechanically, too scared to give way to the screaming pain which lies just below the surface. The only comfort comes from speaking to others who have lost beloved spouses. Well-meaning friends admonish me when I say I have no future, but what possible future, in any meaningful sense, could you have in your late seventies and after fifty years of an extremely close marriage? Not sure whether I am still in shock or whether it is normal to continue in a state of numbness.

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Hello Music maker,
I am so very sad for you and relate 100 percent to the overwhelming pain and shock that you are feeling. I lost my beloved husband of over 40 years in exactly the same way, no illness, no warning, nothing. There are no words of comfort except to say that I feel your pain and you are not alone on this terrifying journey. You have the lovely old dogs, treasure them, they will be grieving too. Try if you possibly can to take some comfort in their company.
I am so sad for all of us. X

Dear Reader,
I know the pain you are suffering. This happened to me and my world came crashing down! The devastation you feel is unbearable, I know. The only advice I can give is to live one day at a time and that way you will live through this terrible time. Don’t think about the future. Patience

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Thank you Patience,
To think about the future is impossible even though each day I’m reminded in a million ways of things that my loved one will never share with me again. There is only today, I’m even surprised that I wake up to face another one knowing how terrifyingly empty they seem without him. The only way all of us on here can survive the pain is to know we are not alone in our suffering.

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Yes, terrifyingly empty is an apt description of life without a beloved husband. And, yes, it is only the knowledge that we are not alone in our pain that enables us to go on. I wouldn’t wish this desolation and grief on anyone, but it is nonetheless a solace to know that there are others who have been through it, or are currently going through it, and who understand the depths of one’s suffering.

Sudden loss is so very traumatic because there is no way to prepare even slightly. It’s as if your whole world has been ripped apart overnight!
One day, so a friend ( who has experienced this 4 years ago) tells me, there will be comfort in knowing that your loved one knew no pain or suffering.
As a person now bereaved for 7 weeks, I am glad that my lovely husband was happy and in a good place in his life when he left us. I am also desperately sad that his life was taken from him too soon. My life without him is so painful and I miss him so badly. I cannot imagine four years on! I just would give anything to be with him and out of this sad world we are living in.

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