I can’t go on

I eel like I have been in a huge chasm since Matthew my son passed 7/11/21 we went away for Christmas so we where out of the house . I used to be alcoholic but haven’t touched drink for over 20 years . It has been really hard not to just get wrecked . I came home yesterday and went to bed didn’t want to see 22 in . Got up this morning after sobbing for over an hour and my washing machine has given up on me . Great start to new year my husband is just snapping at me all the time and even asked why I was upset . I honestly just want to give up now .

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Hi Ajth, very well done for giving up the alcohol and keeping off it at this awful time, really must be difficult not just to have something to help take the edge off. Gosh I feel for you, only weeks since you lost your Mathew and all this Christmas and new year on top. I knew Christmas would be bad I expected it, but it is worse than I thought trying to get through it all and pretend I am half way coping. I don’t think anyone can understand other than a mother who lost a child. My husband also gets annoyed at my behaviour as well and thinks I am crazy, well yes I am crazy I will admit to it and I don’t think I will ever be sane again, just have to learn to live with it if that is possible. Everything is so much of an effort now, I think my washing machine breaking down would be too much for me to at the moment. Hang on in there like the rest of us. Hugs jss x

Hi JJs thank you so much for your kind words . It’s the horrible feeling that although my husband and eldest son are with me I’m alone x I’m sure you and everybody else feels the same in the group x

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We are all never alone on here xx

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i lost my husband on the 18/11/21 so know whqt you are going through after loosing someone think you were very brave for going away at cristmas must have been so hard for you to watch every one celebrating while you are still grieving well done for not turning back to the drink
it must be awful for you that your husband is snapping at you instead of giving you hugs

keep strong and just do one day at a time
pat