I know I have posted 2-3 times here but had to do it again.
It’s been two weeks my mom has passed. It was so sudden. She was perfectly fine. No health issues. Out of nowhere she got cardiac arrest and gone. Just like that. We used to talk everyday. My day started with her and ended with her. Her life revolved around me. And she is my life. I cannot accept that she is gone. she was only 58.
I don’t know how I can keep going like this. I lay in the bed all day. I have my sister and brother in law who are taking care of me. I have a boyfriend who is doing everything possible to help me. My dad who is in a bad state is trying to comfort me. I know I’m a burden on everyone but I just can’t get out of it. I have decided to live a miserable life. Mom and I made so many travel plans. How can I do those without her. I’m only 31 and I’m scared to live a long life without her. I looked up ways to end my life but never got the courage to do it and hurt my dad more.
I am going crazy. How can someone just disappear from your life just like that.
I know I have posted 2-3 times here but had to do it again.
Hello, I have read your post a couple of times because you seem to be in such a bad place at the moment. At least you have decided that life is more precious not only to yourself but to your wonderful dad, so please don’t let’s hear any more of those ideas, you are far more valuable.
You have not just a wonderful dad but also a fantastic boyfriend who both seem to be supporting you.
Would your mother expect you to be the one who was supporting them? It’s just a thought because as a mum it’s what I would want my daughter to be doing.
Grief is horrible and hard to deal with and the effect it as on us can be totally unexpected and I think this may be why you are struggling to come to terms with a life without your mum. The dreams you had are all gone and it’s hard for you workout how new ones will come to pass without her but honestly those dreams will come again but in a different format.
Give yourself time but please remember that everyone else needs you to support them as well, they too have lost your mum and if you can help them, it will help you and tomorrows life will be nicer and happier than struggling on your own.
As a mum, I would say to you, live your life to the fullest and do all the things I haven’t been able to do and do them with gusto. I am sending lots of motherly love and blessings. S xx
Thanks Susie. I know my mom would want me to be happy and support others. I am trying but I’m myself so weak. I am struggling. I need my mom the most. I have always been emotionally dependent on her. I have depression and anxiety and she is the one who always helped me live through it. I don’t know how I can keep on going without her. I sit in the room all day thinking about her. I went for a walk with my sister yesterday and I was crying throughout.
Hi mummas daughter
I’m really sorry to hear about your mum she was far too young and it’s so unfair, I too lost my mum last July but she was 85 but to me she was still too young to leave us, I too have struggled every single day at losing her I still feel guilty I feel I can’t move forward although I know I have come a little forward in my grief as I don’t cry as much, but I do try to keep my feelings to me ( although my daughter who still lives at home always says that she is there when ever I need to talk about mum, cry or I’m just having a bad day) please never feel your a burden to anyone, it’s the hardest thing we will ever go through every body’s grief is their own and you will come through, your dad needs you just as much as you need your dad , I can’t say stay strong as I’ve felt so weak as a person since losing my mum but I keep going, I have a photo of mum at my bedside and I say good morning to her and good night I love you every single day, I know I’ll never be the person I was but I couldn’t put my family through another heartache so I live for today each day, stay strong, always here for a chat
Thanks Lynn. Your words brought me some much needed comfort. Losing a mom at any age is difficult.
Moms protect us even when we don’t need that protection. So losing that from your life is scary. For me it was so sudden and unbelievable. I am not ready to let it go. I don’t want to live like this. miss my mumma so much
It is so hard to accept they are gone I still don’t want to believe I’ll never see my mum again, mum was relatively healthy for her age, but after some blood tests she went into hospital and had a ct scan, mri scan and a ultrasound and was diagnosed with secondary liver cancer, I cared for her at home and we only had 6 weeks with her, it’s a rollercoaster of emotions we go through it helps chatting on here to know your not alone, grief is a love that has no where to go.
Yes. We made so many plans and now I’ll feel guilty if I do anything without her. She was so lively and wanted to travel with me. I can’t believe that chance was suddenly taken from her and from us. I have to resume work and I’m not in the state to do anything. She was proud of me getting this new job and she is the one who convinced me to take this job so that’s the only motivation I have for working but all I want to do is sit in the room all day and just think about her and wait for my death to be reunited with her.
I had counselling with cruse I can’t say it honestly helped 100% but I was grateful for them giving me the opportunity to get stuff of my chest and just talk about mum to someone outside the family unit, I’ve read for some it helped and for others it didn’t, maybe it’s worth giving it a try, I went through every emotion for so many months, angry! that mum wasn’t here, lost! like a little girl that just needed her mum, denial! how could mum have gone so quick, acceptance! I won’t ever accept mum’s gone & guilt! For not wanting to move forward or do anything for fear I’m leaving mum behind life is just so cruel sometimes
I have started counselling. It helps but still doesn’t. I don’t know what can help. My biggest fear is living my remaining life without my mom. I’m only 31. I need my mom the most. I take sleep medication so I get some sleep. I wake up scared everyday. A few days ago I woke up screaming. My doctor has prescribed me some antidepressants which I will start talking from today and see if that helps. But I know the only solution is my mom to come back and that’s not happening.
I also read Abt ppl connecting with their loved ones via psychic medium so I’m willing to give that a try too. Anything that connects me to mom…
Yes I would just love to know mum is ok, they say when you are dying a loved one that has passed before you comes to take you, a couple of times mum reached up towards something and I’d like to think it was someone she knew, I’ve had no dreams of mum or felt anything other than one morning I woke early, didn’t want to get up at that point went back to sleep but woke after half an hour when I heard mum say my name, it was as if she was about to walk into my bedroom, I just stared at the ceiling for a few minutes, was weird and I felt a funny sensation on my left arm, but have had nothing else
That made me feel better. I want my mom to come take me when I die. I have watched near death experience videos on YouTube and that’s the experience shared any everyone.
About you hearing her call your name is what I felt last week too. I dozed off on my bed (evening time) and when I heard her calling my name and that’s how I woke up and I felt there is someone standing left to me. I’ve been getting positive dreams ever since and she is in each and every dream ever since she passed.
I think they can see is and they don’t leave our side. That’s what I want to believe.
I never imagined this would happen to me. My mom is the strongest in our family so this happening to her is so unfair. She took care of everyone in the family…I am not able to function without her. I hope I make her proud but for that I’ve to start functioning which right now seems impossible.