I feel so damn proud of myself!
I made the decision to come back to work and although it was tough coming back, I’m so glad I have done it. There’s already been lots of tears and I’ve only been in an hour and a half but I feel supported and cared for - it’s usually my job to care about them; I am a wellbeing officer for older people.
Mark was always so supportive of my work and knew how much I love my job - most of the time! My struggle will be him not being home when I get back for us to talk about our days and cook tea together. But another step forward into this brave new world - with him beside me and in my heart 
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Well done @Markswife. I went back to work a month after my husband passed away and honestly it was the best thing for me. Work is the one place which is ‘normal’ and I’m grateful to have it. It’s a distraction and we need that. If we didn’t have distraction from our grief then I truly think we would go barmy. Out grief is always there and of course we go back to it; in fact it never leaves us really, always in the background even when at work, but that’s ok. It sounds like you have good colleagues which is a blessing. The first day back is the hardest but you’ve taken that first step - well done! xx
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well done, i made the decision to return to work a month after my mum died and just 2 weeks after my Grandma died. Its her funeral tomorrow. I’m still struggling at being back at work, as I work in a hospital caring for others which is where they both died. its hard i haven’t been on the wards they were on since. I haven’t found the strength too yet. but be proud off yourself and keep going
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I agree … i went back to work within a month of losi g Robert. I do think itcwill ve my saviour…these holidays have been so rough for me …i am back to work tomorrow and really think it is for the best.it is a distraction from all this and i feel i would spend my days in bed if i didn’t have it…
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Hi @Crazy_Kate
2nd day back was okay, thank you. Structral changes in the company were announced but all positive - especially if it brings a payrise!
Took a resident to a hospital appointment and she saw the saw consultant as operated on my husband’s cataracts 2 years ago - it was emotional and comforting to be able to thank him for transforming Mark’s eyesight.
Day off today - first proper day alone at home as my son is back to work; I think I’m looking forward to a day with my thoughts whilst doing the housework. It will be a month tomorrow since Mark died.
Thank you for asking and your support. How are you? X
Hi @Markswife ,
I’m pleased to hear you are settling down at work as well as you can. Make the most of your day alone tomorrow; it’s important for us to have that time alone with our thoughts. I still need my lone time even after five and a half years.
I’m ok, thank you for asking. I went back to work yesterday after the festive break. After about an hour it’s like we’ve never been away but actually it felt good to be back. xx
When I lost my mum I had only 3 days compassionate leave. I wasn’t to happy about it but I still went back to work reluctantly. It’s like my employers were more interested in getting their pound of flesh out of me and let’s be honest 3 days before I had only just lost my mum when I was outside my workplace it’s the exact same place where I stand outside for a fag on my break. I probably shouldn’t say this but it’s what I think my job kind of lost me my mum not intentionally but I know for a fact the guilt I feel for being in work that day when I should of been at the hospital with my dad by my mums bedside is intolerable. I cannot forgive myself whatsoever
Anyway my employer couldn’t careless with a 3 day compassionate leave. Suffice to say going back to work helped me to focus its still not easy doing a job as an enforcement officer getting regular abuse of the idiotic public
I went back to work after 7 weeks. I work in a school so this did include two weeks Easter holiday. The first day was the hardest and I cried all the way to work, but it got better. It gave me a reason to get up in the morning and a routine which helped. Also alot of my colleagues knew my husband and I had alot of support from my employer.
Debbie x
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Yeah not all employers are supportive when someone loses a loved one. It should be enshrined in law that an employee has enough paid leave during bereavement not trying to get their pound of flesh out of an employee.
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Hi @Steven
I so sorry about your mum and you were not supported at work. It is a shame more employers are not more supportive. Where I work you only get five days official compassionate leave. But I was signed off by my GP, my employer also has a employee assistance programme where I could have got counselling if I needed it.
Debbie x
Yes employers should have more compassion. They would know what it’s like if they were treated the same as I was
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