Hello
I am working in a job as a civil enforcement officer. To me it’s an extremely challenging and stressful job. I love what I do
Everyday is different I work 4 days on 4 days of for nearly 10 hours. I always get abuse non violent and violent sometimes I’m attacked for booking someone’s car. I don’t get commission just a basic salary and no matter what I’m paid it’ll never be nowhere near enough. It’s not enough for the way I’m treated. Each day I am coping with my grief over losing my mum I honestly I don’t know how I do my job when I have to deal with the abuse. Were taught conflict management and conflict resolution im supposed to attempt to diffuse conflict. It’s either fight or flight. I prefer to walk away. Apparently it’s my fault a driver gets a penalty charge notice. I am not responsible in any way that they chose to park illegally.
It’s their responsibility you do the crime you face the consequences.
Whilst I love what I do how do I cope with my grief. I know I have to cope but the stress is immense. I think a documentary should be made about what we have to deal with on a daily basis
Hi Steven.
I’m so sorry you have lost your mum and also that you have to deal with abuse when you are just doing your job.
People forget that we all have things to deal with and act badly when it is their own fault.
Have you some people around you who can offer support?
Be kind to yourself and keep reaching out for some support here.
We all understand how you are feeling
Take care
Are or have you gotten counseling? Counseling after parental loss helped me a lot. It is a place to vent and air things out.
It might help you cope with your job and the loss. That is a lot.
I envy you having a job you love. I lost mine after my father died leaving me to care for my mother. Now it is only freelance.
Condolences. I have interviewed and interviewed and nothing. A job would distract me from grief and loss and give me a schedule. Miss that so much.
No Berit. I’ve tried counselling more than once and no matter what I experience with counselling I keep coming back to the same thing that if the counsellor hasn’t lost a mum then how can they possibly understand my situation.
Trust me my job isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. As long as you don’t mind walking up to 20 miles 10 hours a day 4 days a week and dealing with the abuse then this job is for people like you It’s not for the faint hearted.
I think when you do these type of jobs you eventually get “burnout” and cannot cope with the negativity that is so constant. Even if you think you are coping, subconsciously you may not be.
The negativity and abuse is really not good for anyone, you have had a significant loss which is life changing. I presume you have taken the sick leave that you are entitled to ?.
Grieving takes time, energy and is emotionally and physically very draining. i wonder if you are on auto pilot and that is how you are getting through the working day, can you reduce your hours either temporarily or permanently, can you do a different job within your organisation ( ie office based) for a while till you feel stronger.
The grief is not going to go away, you will learn how to live with it and carry it with you but you need time to do that, you need quiet times when you can think about your mum and grieve for your loss.
Maybe go to your GP and get some time off sick then you can take that much needed time otherwise you could end up getting quite ill mentally or physically.
Hope this helps you make a decision.
Hi thank you for your reply
No I haven’t taken the sick leave. It’s not a good idea to use it long term. My employer would put me on stage 2 I’m already on stage 1. I’d only use sick leave if I’m unwell say with flu but not for grief.
I will admit I am finding it extremely hard to cope in this job. Changing my job isn’t an option as I do love my job and as for working office based it’s not something I would consider my job is street based.
There are so many things my employers are doing that put more pressure on my job it’s an issue I’ll have to put up with.
This job comes with the abuse from the abusive public I’ve been doing this job long enough nearly 9 years to know this. You do take the rough with the smooth as an enforcement officer you find this out from day one. If I’m going to continue in this job I have to put up with what’s thrown at me come what may.